Mere arrives home late one rainy winter evening. Christmas lights twinkle inside her house as she VOs, "It's an urban myth that suicide rates spike at the holidays. Turns out they actually go down." Through a window, we see Izzie putting the final touches on an enormous Christmas tree. MereVO: "Experts think it's because people are less inclined to off themselves when surrounded by family." Mere opens the front door and steps into a winter wonderland that would make the Scientologists weep. George walks over to stand next to Mere, and whispers, "It looks like Santa threw up in here." Mere tells him to just go with it; they're "being supportive." Izzie tears herself away from her tree to ask what they think. "Did I go too overboard? I know sometimes I can go overboard." Mere and George say it's great, just great. Izzie gushes, "Oh, yay! I LOVE CHRISTMAS!" Mere and George exchange glances at this psychotic display of Xmas kookoopants. MereVO: "Ironically, that same family togetherness is thought to be the reason that depression rates actually do spike at the holidays." Izzie busies herself scattering jingle bells all over the already-bedecked mantle, and Mere adds, "Yeah, okay. Izzie doesn't count." I'd like to go on record as vehemently disagreeing.
Cut to Burke's. Cristina walks in to find a much more subdued scene: Burke has bought a tabletop tree, which he says he thought they could decorate together. Cristina acts like he's just asked her if they could shove bamboo underneath each one of her toenails, together, and cuts him off: "I'm Jewish." Burke's like, "Seriously?" Cristina reminds him of her stepfather, Saul Rubenstein. So, actually, Cristina is: a) not Jewish, just making shit up to get out of decorating a tree with her hot boyfriend; and b) kind of an asshole. Burke says oh, right, he forgot. Cristina and her Christmas-sized chip head out the door.
Bailey leads rounds, doing the pregnant-lady waddle as she goes. George and Mere snark on her: "Look at her! She's almost as wide as she is tall!" "Are her ankles swollen?" Izzie asks what's going to happen when she goes on leave. Cristina: "Leave? She's going on leave?" Mere: "What do you think happens when people push babies out of their vagina?" Hee. Alex says they'll probably just leave them unattended, see how much damage they can do. Izzie: "Yeah, well, you would know." So, what, is she still mad at Alex? THE ENTIRE WORLD couldn't tell. Izzie then says they should all get Bailey a Christmas gift for the baby, or organize some kind of Secret Santa thing. Cristina starts to protest, but George and Mere shout over her that a Secret Santa thing sounds great. They turn to Cristina and tell her they're being supportive.