Grey's Anatomy
Hard Bargain

Episode Report Card
Joe R: B | 3 USERS: A
YOU GRADE IT
We Bought a Zoo

Inside, Dr. Webber turns a corner and catches the poster-vandalizer red-handed. It's Smash! That "Compassion" that Dr. Avery was so vexed by now just says "ASS." Man, if even a fanboy like Smash is disillusioned with Seattle Grace in the Pegasus era, things must be really bad.

Owen and Cahill are in the conference room with a bunch of suits as paperwork is being handed out to begin making the sale official. Derek interrupts and asks to speak to Owen. By the time Owen stands up, Meredith, Callie, and Arizona are there too. In rapid succession, they each tender their resignation from Seattle Grace, effective immediately. Cristina's there too, and Owen look at her like she just shot him in the chest. Not yet, though, Owen. You have to wait for it. And with all eyes on her, Cristina says she quits too. The room is aghast. No way the sale goes through now. And Owen Hunt's heart is in little glass shards on the floor.

After the break, the Seattle Five are going over the next steps. Like meeting with Stan, getting their patients covered, and cleaning out their lockers. Cristina bemoans the look that Owen gave her, but Meredith assures her that she's helping Owen in the long run. Dr. Webber shows up with Smash in tow, like a kid he found in his backyard. He's like, "Dr. Shepherd, I believe this young man has something to say to you..." But Derek surprises us all and asks Smash if he "got them all." Well, well, looks like Derek was the mastermind behind all the vandalizing. He tells Smash he can go now. I knew Smash was too much of a fanboy to step out of line! Webber looks at the Five and knows something's up. Meredith assures him he'll know soon. Cristina is still hung up on the look on Owen's face -- she wants to go tell him what's going on, but Meredith convinces her that she can't do that yet. When the time is right, she'll tell him, and he'll understand. Cristina isn't sure he will.

April and Matthew are hardcore making out on the couch, but he puts on the brakes because he has something to tell her. He's super nervous and he thinks it will drive her away. Are you already there? I hope so: he's a virgin. And he's going to stay that way. He's saving himself for marriage. April can barely suppress the giant smile on her face. She says she can absolutely deal with it, because that's great, because she can. But then, she says, "I am too." And she doesn't include the part where she was and then she wasn't and now she is again, and you just KNOW that little sin of omission is going to become a huge thing, and it's going to be gross and he's going to implicitly call her a whore and we're all going to hate him but also hate April too because she's April and she could have avoided this whole mess if she'd just played this moment right here differently.

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Grey's Anatomy

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