Cristina seems to be on full-time Izzie duty these days and is working away when an alarm goes off and Izzie's vitals all plummet. Cristina runs into the room past the dresses and feels for Izzie's pulse while watching the flat line on the monitor, but Izzie can no longer contain herself and bursts into really obnoxious, hysterical laughter. Cristina isn't pleased at all as Izzie cries that she should have seen her face: "It's your totally freaking out face!" Cristina can't believe it's a joke and quite frankly, neither can I -- even knowing how self-centered and generally cruel Izzie can be, this is extra low. If you have a disease that might actually kill you, don't scare your friends even more by pretending to die. She just recently learned how alone it felt to go through this with no one by her side, so maybe she shouldn't be alienating them with utterly tasteless pranks. Once Izzie gets her laughter under control, she tells Cristina she does in fact need her help, and can she go get Mere to try on the dresses, since Mere is ignoring Izzie's pages? For one glorious, hopeful second I thought Cristina might actually throttle Izzie with her bare hands, but sadly no.
Derek, Mark and Hunt are giving Gates the rundown of his injuries which we learned from the CT earlier. Owen adds to the list that Gates' spleen is bleeding but they will keep an eye on it, and Mark helpfully adds that his ruptured eardrum might result in permanent hearing loss. It's bleak, and I feel like he and Derek are keeping up their fighting to the point where each is trying to sound like they're delivering the worse news. The enormity of it all hits Gates, and he begins to yell about how Meloy actually dove in front of his car with arms outstretched. Derek tries to calm him down but he can't after that, and he cries, "I was going to the bank! I was just going to the bank!" The camera pans over to Owen, scowling, so we can be sure to catch that he is learning something from all of this.
Meredith has finally made it to Izzie's room but is clearly not happy about it -- she calls from inside the bathroom that if she shows Izzie the dress, Izzie can't tell anyone because it's really bad. Izzie smiles dismissively (just in case you didn't hate her completely from her previous scene) and says it's their secret, so Mere shuffles out in a giant explosion of tulle. Izzie of course proceeds to take a picture, to Mere's horror, and then looks for the matching tiara. Mere protests mightily, adding that she wants a simple wedding with buffalo wings at the reception but Izzie informs her that caterers don't even do buffalo wings. I'm fairly certain that caterers would prepare anything you paid them to make, within reason, and that there are plenty out there who can do buffalo wings with ease -- in fact, I think I would love a reception with beer and wings. But I am not Izzie, thank goodness. If Mere told me she wanted a small wedding and a dress that didn't stand up by itself or make noise whenever she moved, I would agree to that (and probably wouldn't have gotten said dress in the first place). But a crestfallen Izzie insists that Meredith is getting married and it's a really big deal, and doesn't she want to celebrate it? If Meredith gets married in a slip dress that would make Izzie sad, and she's already sad enough because she has cancer. Seriously, this is disgusting. It's not funny, or endearing, it's selfish and gross. But Meredith is a pushover, and after rolling her eyes asks for the tiara. Izzie loves it, while Meredith rightly hates it completely.