It's time to check in with Izzie and the Key-Swallowing Boyfriend and the Girl He Really Should Leave Because DAMN Does She Ever Shut Up? Izzie's sticking a tube down the guy's throat and his girlfriend is just shrieking at him about what an ass he is. As she does this, his throat tenses and the keys start to go farther down, making them harder to get to. Suddenly, the girlfriend's all concerned. She asks her boyfriend to breathe and gets him to calm down and Izzie finally gets the keys out. The boyfriend kind of grins at his girlfriend and she loudly accuses him of choking on the keys on purpose and Izzie just turns to her and says, "Can I offer you some advice? Get in your car and go. For all our sakes." Hee. Nice, Izzie. "You're never gonna find where I parked it!" rasps the boyfriend. Heh. They deserve each other.
Meredith and Bailey leave Claire's OR and both declare they need showers. Bailey tells Meredith to go tell Claire's parents her condition. "You're not gonna let me shower?" asks Mere. "That would be a hoop, would it not?" asks Bailey. "It would qualify," says Mere. Bailey kind of grins at her begrudgingly. "Shower first, then." Mere passes by Izzie in the locker room and gets a, "Ewww, what smells?" response out of her. Mere explains about Claire's bowels all over her and Izzie says, "That makes me strangely happy." Cristina wakes up from her perch on a bench and says, "Ohhhh, Meredith, you smell like--" "Karma," snits Izzie. "What?" says Mere. "Nothing," smirks Izzie. God, I really don't like her. I like her later, during season two, but damn, I did NOT remember her being this irritating.
Meredith looks at her face in the mirror and sees particles of Claire's bowels residing in her hair. "How much do I love being a surgeon right now?" she grunts. "Karma!" simpers Izzie. "What does karma have to do with anything?" asks Mere in an annoyed tone. Izzie, being tremendously self-satisfied right now, says that Mere's been given all the best surgeries and now she smells like putrid goo. Whatever. Fuck off, Izzie. Bailey enters and says Shepherd needs an intern. Cristina volunteers. Bailey says she looks like shit. Cristina says she's fine. Bailey asks for Meredith and Izzie gets all bitchy again. "What is your problem?" Meredith asks. "Um...YOU," says Izzie. "Because, apparently, you can help Dr. McDreamy in ways the rest of us can't!" Mere's all, you did not just-- and Izzie is all, oh I totally just-- and Bailey's all, EVERYONE SHUT THE FUCK UP. She orders Cristina to Shepherd's OR. Izzie storms off and Bailey walks over to Mere. "Apparently, I'm not the only one with hoops," she quips. Heh. I like Bailey's hoops better. At least they have a purpose.