Previously on If the Trailer's a Rockin', Two Doctor's are Doin' the Nasty on the World's Smallest Bed: George got a date, Cristina scheduled an appointment at the local abortion clinic, and Meredith learned Derek's favorite color and they scampered off to make sweet trailer park love in Derek's Silver Bullet on a hill.
As Meredith's VO talks about how secrets can't hide in science and medicine has a way of exposing the lies, we follow a trail of discarded clothes along the floor until they lead us to a pair of hairy, naked legs. The naughty bits at the top of the legs are hidden by a big-ass book entitled, "Rashes, Hives, and Skin Eruptions." Mmmm. Excellent book. Number two for three weeks running on the New York Times bestsellers list! I keep it next to my bed. For those nights when I just really, really, REALLY need a good nightmare filled with pulsating ass boils and scaly, rash-covered genitals.
It turns out that George is the one reading the book and after Meredith's VO says something about trying to keep the secrets they all have from permeating the hospital, George looks directly down at his crotch and we are forced to realize that the rashes, hives, and skin eruptions he's reading about are very likely occurring in or around the general region of his Long Duk Dong. He looks severely disgusted with himself. And his dong.
Izzie starts rattling the doorknob, wanting to get in and take a shower. George is busy staring at his tallywhacker, however, and says he'll be out in a minute. Izzie nosily wants to know what he's doing in there. Well, Izzie, he's in the bathroom and the shower isn't on. I'd say he's taking a crap, but since that wouldn't prevent your nosy fucking ass from just barging in and jumping into the shower, I won't bother to try and inform you of George's current status. I hate it when people ask that question outside the bathroom door. What the fuck do you THINK I'm doing in here? Crocheting a new goddamn shower curtain? Mind your business!
But George just says that he's doing something private and Dirty Izzie immediately assumes that he's masturbating. She walks away all, "Ohhhhhh. Never mind! Have at it! Just... don't leave a stain on the floor, okay?" George is appalled and starts sputtering that he's not doing what she thinks he's doing... while standing in the middle of the bathroom with a gargantuan book covering his dingle. Izzie parks herself outside the door with a magazine and tells George that she'll just wait until he's finished, like, GO BACK TO YOUR ROOM, IZZIE. Even if he IS tossing off, do you really need to listen to it?