Alex and Izzie sit down in the ER waiting room on either side of a patient with giant grins on their face and begin trying to seduce him to the free clinic. He suspiciously asks if she's hitting on him, but she just wants to offer him 8 million dollars worth of free care. They do a great tag-team of doctorflirt and also scaring him into getting seen immediately.
Cristina is doing an echocardiogram on Ellis, and Ellis notes that she and Meredith are good friends. She can tell since Cristina won't look at her. "As if I might ask some personal question about her, and you might accidentally slip." Cristina merely keeps not looking at her and silently working, but Ellis sees a kindred spirit and knows just how to butter her up by asking, "But you don't do anything accidentally, do you?" Cristina looks pleased, and Ellis asks if her daughter has chosen a specialty. When Cristina points out that was a personal question, Ellis agrees that it's the most personal question for a surgeon. Cristina mutters that her own mom would ask if she had a boyfriend, and Ellis, ever tactful, announces, "Your mother sounds like a frivolous woman." I feel like that sort of falls into the realm of, "I can complain about and insult my family but not you," territory, but Cristina just caves and asks, "If I chose cardiothorasics, what would that say about me?" Ellis explains, "Heart surgeons are the know-it-alls. They're the most ambitious, the most driven. They want it all and they want it now. And they don't want anything getting in their way." Cristina takes this to digest, and Ellis announces that she learned she's in an Alzheimer's study and wants a neuro consult with the doctor who put her there. I smell shenanigans!
Cristina finds Mere outside and asks if she's okay, and Mere merely responds by talking about this "gift." Cristina tells her that Ellis wants to meet McDreamy but nips Mere's freakout in the bud when she explains it's McDreamy the doctor, not McDreamy her boyfriend. She adds, "I'm kind of in love with her, by the way." Mere grumbles, "She has that effect on people who aren't her daughter." Izzie comes out with her hijacked patient in tow and stops to find out how Meredith is doing. She assures Mere that her mom won't be disappointed now that she's a doctor and both she and Cristina pressure her to go have an actual talk with her mom. Izzie's patient timidly speaks up to go get some actual medical care, but she only leaves the gabfest when he threatens to go back to the ER. Cristina is delighted (and maybe even a little bit proud?) that Izzie is stealing patients, and Izzie admits that she doesn't want her inheritance to have gone to just funding an empty room. Don't feel bad, Izzie, there's cool colored sheets in there that are much snazzier than regular hospital-issue white. Feel proud that it looks good! She doesn't want to go crazy since, "George called dibs on all the crazy this week. Do you think she's pregnant?" And on that incredibly inappropriate and rude note, she wheels off with her stolen patient. Meredith asks what that was all about, and Cristina realizes she was gone and announces, "Bambi got married!" I guess if he's Bambi that makes Izzie Thumper -- annoying but still his best friend. It works.