Kev walks up and cuts the love-fest short by saying, "Dude. She really sucks, huh?" Dave's drawn out of his reverie and delivers a stunned, "Huh?" Kev shakes his head and wonders why Dave doesn't ask her out already. Unfortunately, as Dave informs him, every time he gets the nerve to ask Schmarce out, he totally freezes up. Kev tells him that when he has something important to say, he writes it down first, so it comes out ultra-smooth. Dave just stares at him. "Yeah," he says, "that really seems to be working out well for you, man." Kev looks crushed: "Why you gotta lash out?" Poor Kev. Cursed with a job that requires him to talk to guys who deliver diminishing blows with words like "really" and "man."

Over in Rob's office, Coco enters as the man himself is exiting his bathroom, holding the accursed magazine in one hand and a jerk-rag in the other. Okay, so he's not really holding a jerk-rag in one hand, but he should be. He exits a bathroom with a titty magazine and the toilet's flushing? Hello? He wasn't taking a stellar poo in there, people! Hank4 has confirmed my suspicions that ol' Robbo was spanking the proverbial monkey. He was beating the meat, pulling his pud, becoming "familiar with himself." And he was using Coco's jugs as inspiration. (Stay tuned, people. You'll see many, many more euphemisms for breasts in this recap. I'm in the mood for a little thesaurus time.)

Coco's far too dim to put two and two together, so she just says, "I wanted to talk to you about that." Rob, having been caught with his pants in a puddle, says, "This. Yes. I wanted to talk to you too. I was...using my phone...in there...to...CALL you...about this! Right now!" Good one, Robbo. You'd better thank your lucky stars that all that exists between Coco's ears is a cavernous space the size of an airport hangar, buddy, or you'd be in big fucking trouble right about now.

Coco's all indignant and wants to sue the bastards. The "bastards" being her ex, the magazine, "all of them." Who else is there, Coco? God is in the details, girlfriend. Keep it simple. Deegan and the mag are really the only ones to blame. Stick to them and call it a day. Rob isn't so keen on this whole "suing" idea, because it'll just draw attention to it. He tells Coco to relax because it'll all just blow over. "Listen, Courtney," he says cautiously, but with a hint of interest, "is there anything else I should know about?" "No! Absolutely not!" says Courtney. "Sex tapes? Drug problems? Lesbian affairs?" Rob's definitely showing his colors here. "No!" says Courtney, her feathers all ruffled. "No?" says Rob. "Not even in college?" Okay, it's easy to see that Rob's just looking for a little more self-fulfillment fodder. If Courtney came up with even a misguided freshman spin-the-bottle incident, Rob'd be back in that bathroom faster than you can say "Spooge Monster."