And we're back at the "studio establishing shot," which is quickly replacing the lame intro as the most annoying aspect of this show. Guess what, WB? We GET IT. It's a studio, okay? We don't need you to give us that aerial of the studio buildings every damn time we come back from commercial. For God's sake! This is how they came back from commercial the last two times! WE'RE NOT RETARDED. GIVE IT UP.
Anyway, outside Johnny's trailer, Johnny is waxing his board (heh heh heh) on top of some scary blue IKEA chairs (trust me -- I know from IKEA, and these are IKEA) while DTSI lounges on a chair, as he is wont to do. DTSI asks Johnny to lend him $120 to get his car out of the shop. Johnny thinks it's enough that he's letting DTSI live in his trailer. DTSI thinks that Johnny can spare the "cashish," whatever that means. Courtney strolls up wearing a tiny green t-shirt that says "NO BOYS ALLOWED" just above the breasts. And, if that isn't enough, she's sporting braids. Not a braid. BRAIDS. She looks like a Beverly Hillbilly, goddammit.
Courtney asks Johnny to sign a cast photo for her boyfriend back home who's a really big fan of the show. Johnny asks whom he should make it out to. Courtney tells him, "Deegan." Johnny looks at her as if she's just asked him to find the root of Pi. Courtney spells it out for him like a first-grade schoolteacher, and Johnny signs the photo with a flourish. Or at least he lets the pen fly like he's piercing wombats with it. He hands the photo back to Courtney. Courtney reads Johnny's message: "Dear Deegan, weird name, stay cool, Johnny." Courtney thanks him with an expression on her face that denotes her complete knowledge that this man is an utter tool.
Courtney walks off, and DTSI pursues his monetary goal as Johnny watches Courtney's ass. Johnny ignores him as light dawns on marble head and Johnny recalls that the picture he just signed was for Courtney's boyfriend. "I can't believe the new girl has a boyfriend," states Johnny, the über-turd.
Hunter and Quentin are hauling ass down a sidewalk as Quentin takes Danny DeVito for a walk. Hunter is saying, "This is completely unacceptable. You've got to talk to Rob and Hope." Quentin asks Hunter to chill because she's completely freaking his pig. Note to Quentin: Hunter's not freaking your pig. YOU are freaking US with your pig. Hunter informs Quentin that "Stone" cannot kiss "Laura," and that "Stone" and "Becky's" relationship is the heart and soul of the show. Oh, please, Hunter. The heart and soul of the show is tits and lip-gloss and you very well know it. "We've gotta put a stop to this," says Hunter. "Hey," says Quentin, "you wanna bitch and moan to the producers, fine. But I don't want 'Stone' to wind up in a coma." You mean he isn't already?
Hunter stops Quentin. "Look. Every girl in America is in love with 'Stone.' And it's not because he's been a senior in high school for five years and works in a tire factory. It's because of his love for 'Becky.'" Quentin looks at Hunter dead-on and says, "Well, according to my website, it's because of my soulful eyes and great ass." WHEEEE! Quentin then says that if he kisses "Laura," it might spice things up a bit. Hunter tries to cajole Quentin over to her side by bringing up Johnny and his character's relationship with Tori2. Hunter apparently thinks that just because Johnny's character is faithful to Tori2's character, it'll make him more popular than Quentin's character if Quentin's character macks with Courtney's character. I have no idea what warped logic Hunter's using here, but I don't have time to ponder it, because Courtney's bi-braided ass appears between Hunter and Quentin.