Crazy! Careening! The courthouse. The Sphincter tries to convince Schultz to put him on the stand. Great idea. When the Li'l Mrs. says maybe they should run this by Jason, who is not there for some reason, Schultz gets touchy: "Excuse me. I don't need to run every decision by Jason." Ass Face poops out some lines about wanting to tell the truth on the stand for the sake of his baby. The Li'l Mrs. moves closer to him and they murmur about the Man Heinie going to prison, until Schultz interrupts: "Could the three of us make love?" His reaction shot is great, as he shakes his head in confusion over what he just blurted out.
The Sphincter takes the stand, grandstanding about the great American tradition of disagreement and not believing in change through violence. Oh, put a sock in it, Kerry/Edwards '05. On cross-examination, the D.A. pulls out a surprise video with footage of Butt Lips agitating in front of the dealership. This doesn't seem particularly incriminating to me, but everyone in the courtroom looks pretty down about it.
Hallway outside courtroom. Schultz, Li'l Mrs., and Butt Face sit with hangdog expressions. Jason walks up and asks what happened. Li'l Mrs. blames Schultz for putting her goober husband on the stand and then says, "The D.A. made him look like a lunatic." There's a very thin line between appearance and reality, kid. Jason is irritated, Schultz is defensive, no one has heard from Lou. Maybe he got downwind of this show and decided to bail early? Jason asks if Schultz is ready to close and he responds by saying he's going to hide in the toilet, and tells Jason to stall.
A backroom poker game. Lou is on his cell phone at the table, which I'm pretty sure is a no-no, though I'm not positive, as my gambling expertise is in slots, and any other game of no skill. Schultz is talking in an excited tone, telling Lou to get to court right now with the bookie, while Lou is cool as a cucumber, telling him not to worry, that he takes "care of my job, you take care of yours." The camera cuts to a man who as much as any human being I've ever seen looks like a fat little Tyrannosaurus Rex, with the rectangular head set at a right angle with his body, and little wavy arms out front. Plus, he's wearing sunglasses, so he looks like some demented museum curator's attempt to make dinosaurs "cool" to kids by putting one in a Hawaiian shirt and Ray-Bans. Lou makes small talk with the T-Rex Bookie, until he growls out a "come on, come on" and Lou decides to go all in. The bookie folds and then demands to see Lou's hand. Lou tells him he'll show him only if T-Rex gives him something in return. Lou gets the promise and then reveals that he had a seven of spades and a four of diamonds, or, as T-Rex barks, "Nothing!"