Elise's spaghetti and meatballs is messy, but Will's take lacks seasoning. No points for you! Jennifer's Southwestern chicken noodle soup bests Paul's flat-flavored Italian riff on the classic. With one dish to go, Red is only a point ahead. Can they win this decisive battle, or will Blue even it up? Carrie is set to present her shrimp-basil pesto and blistered heirloom tomato pizza against Jonathon's pistachio, truffle oil, and honey flatbread. But since Tommy called the shots, Jonathon refuses to carry it up. As anticipated, Carrie's pizza is raw, a point which Wolfgang punctuates by smashing up the pizza in his hands and handing it back to her -- though he does invite her to Spago so he can show her how to make a pizza properly. Not a bad way to lose! Or does she? When Jonathon takes the lid off his pie, there is a large amount of water (or something?) floating around on top. Wolfgang literally takes five spoonfuls of it off the top, saying, "If you go to Italy, they'll arrest you for this." When Ramsay notes that it smells like honey, Wolfgang snarks, "Everything we don't need on a pizza, you put on." Jonathon tries to exculpate himself (and throw Tommy under the bus). The judges refuse to taste the pizza at all. No! Points! For! You! As such, Red ekes out a victory. Jonathon curses an appropriately Blue streak, and Elise interviews the Carrie has nothing to celebrate since she nearly sunk them.
The ladies win a classic car cruise down the Sunset Strip as well as a "very unique, very personal" show at the Laugh Factory. I don't know about you, but the idea of a personalized comedy show sends chills down my spine. Meanwhile, the guys will clean both kitchens, plus the dorms, then prep for tonight's service. The only thing worth noting about the girls' evening is that Elise is wearing a feather fascinator headband. Back at HKHQ, Jonathon goes MIA while everyone else works, blaming his absence on a crick in his neck -- likely from all the crazy wagging during one of his angry rants. He finally returns with 53 minutes until the start of service, at which point all of his teammates ice him out and relegate him to dicing tomatoes. Over on Red, Elise thinks they all need to get on the same page (presumably hers) so they can have a successful service.
The doors open, and in pile tonight's special guests -- the U.S. Coast Guard. For some reason, Carrie is again tackling the task of cooking pizzas tonight, which Ramsay questions. Carrie assures him she'll be fine, but she immediately botches her first crust, rolling it so thin that it has holes. On the other side, Ramsay gives the Blue Team a pep talk to the tune of, "Don't fuck up." Under the influence of his excruciating neck pain, Jonathon immediately does just that by overstuffing the pasta basket. Back on Red, that darn risotto strikes again as Carrie struggles to put out anything at all. Jamie steps in, and Red starts getting out appetizers. Not so much for Blue. Jonathon and Natalie continue to suck wind. Will says it "was like a fish market with all that floundering going on." After several attempts at the lobster cappellini, Ramsay assigns Paul to educate Jonathon under the threat that he'll kick him and Natalie out.