Hell's Kitchen
12 Chefs Compete

Episode Report Card
Monty Ashley: B | Grade It Now!
The Case of the Hungry Sumo Wrestlers

The punishment for the men is to make fortune cookies and to decorate the restaurant with origami. Lacey interviews that she's sick of the punishments and appears to claim that it's not fair that she keeps losing because after all "I can't win challenges." Or something. I realize that doesn't make a lot of sense. Take it up with her.

In the dorms, Lacey is going on about how she's going home and Giovanni is shouting at her to stop assuming their team is going to lose. So Lacey starts complaining about how she's in a room with eleven people that hate her. That's not counting me, I guess. Ben tries to give her a pep talk. Lacey's reaction: "Ben's trying to blow smoke up my ass. Whatever."

As the red team goes on a limo ride, they also talk about Lacey.

In the kitchen, the blue team does their thing. Lacey gets on everyone's nerves by talking nonstop. She does sort of a Gordon Ramsay impression and talks to the origami swans and gets compared to a tack-hammer to the eye. Well, her voice is compared to a tack-hammer to the eye. You'd think the hammer would he hitting an ear, but Robert has not thought out this metaphor any better than he did with that line about the brotherhood of women.

The women are in a dojo, and Gordon Ramsay comes out in one of those inflatable sumo suits. And then so does Jean-Phillipe! JP does not look delighted by this. The two of them fight, and I don't know if you know this, but Chef Ramsay is incredibly competitive. So he wins. Then the women put on the suits and bonk into each other for a while. Before he leaves, Gordon says, "Have a great day, yes? Well done, ladies, yes? Well done." If you're working on your own Gordon Ramsay impression, note that he says "...yes?" at the end of almost every sentence. It's a compulsion.

In the kitchen, the men have finished their fortune cookies and are trying to fold cranes by following the instructions. One of them claims that "this will piss me off to no avail," which is not how the saying goes. I think they should set up an assembly line, so one person can be in charge of the first two folds, etc. Couldn't go any worse than their current plan. Lacey finishes one and takes the opportunity to ingratiate herself with her new teammates by crowing "In your face, I'm done. Bee-atch!" That's some good smack talk right there.

The red team's reward is not over: they are learning about sake. It appears that what most of them learn is that they like to drink a lot of it. The blue team claims that origami brings them together as a team, when the red team staggers in. LA in particular is completely drunk.

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Hell's Kitchen




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