Jennifer in particular is excited, because she loooooooves People. "I get it every week!" she tells us. Jennifer seems nice and all, but it's not like we all expected to hear she reads The Economist cover to cover every week.

So the first dishes brought to the judges are the fried ones, but Ramsay's probably not going to knowingly attempt to poison anyone, not even journalists, so he tells Gina to tell the writers what happened. "I was on a team with Carrie..." Gina begins, which is hilarious, because it's almost like she expects the guests to be sympathetic. "Oh, with Carrie? I heard about that bitch!" Ramsay makes her bring the dish back to the kitchen, and Carrie whines to us about being thrown under the bus. "I don't like girls," Carrie tells us, and it's not terribly surprising to find out Carrie is one of those "I don't like girls" girls.

Meanwhile, the judges like Paul's dish of fried chicken with roasted corn and rosemary grit and basic gravy. "It's not easy to eat, but it's worth it once you get the taste," says the EW writer, whatever that's supposed to mean. Ramsay gets one more dig in when he points out that whatever it is, it has to be better than raw chicken, so Blue Team gets a point.

Battle of the sauté! Jennifer and Gina's chicken cacciatore (looks awful, tastes great, apparently) versus Jonathon and Will's lemon-herb sautéed chicken, which is also highly praised. The People woman says she could easily see this on a page in their magazine, fighting for space with a real think piece on whoever Hugh Hefner happens to having sex with this year.

Jamie's grilled chicken salad versus Tommy and Monterray's half-breast. People says the flavors in the grilled chicken salad threw her off, but it's cooked really well, and EW agrees that it's cooked perfectly. And since Tommy and Monterray could only come up with half a portion, Red Team gets a point, tying it at two. Admirably, Tommy admirably doesn't publicly blame Monterray, but Monterray does take the fall with his own teammates.