Hell's Kitchen
18 Chefs Compete

Episode Report Card
Daniel: B | 1 USERS: B
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Off to a Bad Start

So Brendan's practically tenting his fingers all Mr. Burns evil at the fact that blue team members are dropping left and right, since he figures he'll roll right over everybody. "This competition is mine, and it's only a matter of time." Ramsay's also not too busy to yell at all the benched chefs that they fucked up the fish station. Steven tries to point out he jumped up to help at the fish station, and Ramsay says he wish Steven had just jumped in the oven instead, as it would have made his life easier.

Carrie's not having a ton of success with her scallops, but not so bad that her food is getting thrown in the garbage. There are shots of annoyed diners checking their watches, and pretending like they're not actually there in the hopes of landing at least a teensy bit of television time. I mean, if you've seen this show, you know that sometimes it takes a while for food to get out there.

Anyway, while the three stooges drink wine and eat scallops, Jonathon rocks on the beef Wellington (which he tells us he's never cooked before), but now Monterray is now not ready with the garnish, so Ramsay sends the protein back.

Elise muscles in on Carrie for the fish to impress Ramsay, which works, if the reaction she was going for was, "What in the fuck is she doing?" He sends her to the red chef's table.

Another perfect Wellington from Jonathon, but they're waiting on garnish, and now Brendan's aura is burning the potatoes. "I've never in my whole career ever been stopped by fucking side items," says Jonathon. Sure, well, roadkill squirrel goes with anything. Paul takes some time out to yell at his teammates for not being as awesome as he is.

So now diners are walking out of the restaurant. Ramsay pulls the stooges up from the chef's table to yell at them and point out that not a single entrée has left the kitchen, and he shows them the pans piling up. Steven offers to wash them. "I'm talking about the customers! Not the fucking pans!" yells Ramsay. And then he says "Fuck off" at somebody.

"At that point it was a train wreck on us," Brendan tells us, whatever that's supposed to mean. And despite Carrie's pep rally cry of "Let's not disappoint the customers!" Ramsay shuts it down.

Teams are lined up. "This for me has been the most disappointing opening ever," Ramsay tells them. He tells Carrie that the scallops weren't so much the problem as things not being timed right. Carrie throws Elise under the bus, which Elise takes exception to, and then they bicker while Ramsay rubs his face in angry despair.

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Hell's Kitchen

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