Hell's Kitchen
7 Chefs Compete

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Fifty Shades of Risotto

Big thanks to Montykins for covering for me while I was A) celebrating a birthday and B) recuperating from The Bachelorette season finale and Bachelor Pad season premiere. Montykins, here's your black jacket. Now, back in line!

We're down to the top six cheftestants and they still can't complete a dinner service?

In the aftermath of the Southern cuisine debacle, Robyn is in near tears over her near-ouster, while Dana's bemoaning the fact they're down to three to Blue's four. She figures a two-person team is better than a three-person with Barbie on it. The editing makes it look like Barbie is making psycho faces at her teammates again, but I'm sure that's some editing shenanigans.

The next morning's challenge is a communication relay: One chef in the kitchen at a time, cooking for five minutes at a stretch and then relaying the status of dishes to the team member relieving them.

First up are Justin and Dana, cooking risotto, lamb and cod -- chosen because they have wildly varying cooking times and techniques. The chefs get to work, and before you know it, Clemenza and Christina are spelling them off (with only fifteen seconds to "download," according to the narrator). Clemenza appears to spend half his time trying to tie his apron, and then Barbie and Brian are in the kitchen. Then Robyn -- who burns some cod -- and Dana who seems frantic and doesn't appear to accomplish a whole lot from Barbie's perspective, although Barbie takes four hours to clean a sinkful of oysters.

Justin, spelling off Robyn, thinks she's pretty useless at communication, and Christina likewise isn't impressed with the lack of organization in their kitchen.

Final round is Clemenza and Barbie to finish things off. Clemenza suddenly stops speaking English because he doesn't understand the instructions from Justin. Barbie calls the kitchen a hot mess. They plate their team's dishes, and we go to commercial assuming the dishes are either raw or burned or some unholy combination of the two.

Clemenza calls his ten minutes total cooking time "a lot harder than it looks." I guess it would have to be, because it doesn't look that hard at all. But obviously the communication skills is what made this tricky, reflected in the risotto. Neither chef who started that dish realized the prepped stuff was raw at first, and the end product isn't too inspiring. Both look like plates of risotto that's already made a trip down someone's esophagus and back up again. Red's is burnt, and Blue's is crunchy, so neither gets a point. "Are you kidding me?" says Ramsay, like even he can't believe he didn't award a point.

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Hell's Kitchen

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