Hell's Kitchen

Episode Report Card
Monty Ashley: C+ | Grade It Now!
Holy Crocamole!

Dinner. Suzanne and Kevin. Kevin's got a huge crepe with a lot of seafood in it. Suzanne talks a lot about her crepe and what she thinks about the general philosophy of crepe-making. Tennille continues to entertain me this week: "You sauteed meat and onions! And put it inside a crepe! Just say that!" Both of them win, so (surprise!) it's tied 2-2, and it all comes down to the last one.

Dessert. The dramatic music sting goes out of control when Gordon and JP look at Dave's crepe. And when we finally get to see it (after the commercial break), I can understand why. It's like a bowl of crepe. It's like crepe soup. Chef Ramsay thinks it looks like diarrhea. That's a problem. He won't even eat it. So what does Sabrina have? "Poached pears and chocolate ganache infused with cinnamon, and then a little Grand Marnier just to give that chocolate a little kick." That sounds really, really good. And Chef Ramsay says it's delicious. The women win.

The next service will have some French additions, including escargots, frogs' legs (all I can see are millions of frogs on tiny crutches!), and crepes. The men will prep both kitchens while the women go to a French restaurant for lunch.

In the dorm, Dave explains what went wrong: "My problem was I couldn't make the crepe!" Well, it's concise. The women do not do the usual over-the-top woofing as they go past the men on their way to the reward; it's just a low-key "Bye, guys!" sort of thing.

The women arrive at what I guess is the French restaurant, although it's got Mexican architecture. They sit in the front row of a theater and watch a mime. And then he starts talking and says he'll be teaching them the language of pantomime. And then they're having a mime-fight. I'm not going to explain that, either. That's what it was. A mime-fight.

The women finish their mime raining and go off to lunch. Gordon is not there, but they appear to enjoy themselves anyway. They have foie gras while the men are having head cheese. Andy appears to really like the head cheese. Dave won't even taste it, and also almost throws up while trying the beef tongue.

Timeskip! The women are back and suited up. Heather (remember Heather? She's a sous chef this season? Was the winner a few seasons back?) runs down the new additions to the menu. That's the frogs and snails.

Suddenly! Andy is slicing potatoes and shouts for a medic. There's a lot of blood, and it appears that he has sliced off the tips of three of his fingers. So off he goes to the hospital, and this show is surprisingly dangerous for the competitors. Dave doesn't think Andy will be coming back tonight, and Van thinks the team is cursed.

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Hell's Kitchen




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