Hell's Kitchen

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Monty Ashley: B- | Grade It Now!
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Sparkle-licious

Finally, it's time for that "Hell's Kitchen Romance" the previews mentioned two weeks ago. Louross and Corey are at the dinner table, and they're wasting no time, as Corey says, "I love you" and Louross answers with "I love you, too." Huh? Louross interviews that they're like peas in a pod and that he hearts her. Corey goes over to the hot tub and does a little (very little) striptease down to her underwear and gets in. So just as I'm thinking this might be an actual thing, Corey interviews that she thinks Louross likes her and that makes him "an easy target". Man. You can't trust anyone anymore. Going into commercial, Louross appears to be joining her in the hot tub.

You know, I don't think they're outside. I think the "patio" area is indoors just like all the rest of their dorms. That's a little weird. Also weird: we come back to some Shaft guitar. And Louross is doing some sort of fake-laughing thing that appears to involve pretending he has buckteeth. Anyway, Corey interviews that she's two feet taller than him and also has a boyfriend, so nothing's happening. That was productive!

Also, it is a full moon. Again!

Next morning, the chefs are in the kitchens and there are gift bags on all the chairs. The chairs in the dining room, I mean. The chefs don't get gifts. Poor chefs! Bobby strolls around the blue kitchen, telling the team that "it should be no problem executing this menu tonight, guys." Correct me if I'm wrong, but shouldn't the food already have been executed? It'll be hard to cook that filet mignon if the cow's wandering through the kitchen mooing. Anyway, the menu in question is the regular one with the three winning dishes from the challenge added. That's the regular menu that they've been mostly unable to finish service with, and a couple new things added. Sure thing, Bobby. No problem at all!

During prep, Ben sneers at the mango salsa. Ben was doing mango salsa when he was 17 years old! Don't waste Ben's time with your unoriginal salsas! Mango, indeed. Tchah! He interviews about how easy it is, and then Shayna (whose avocado-and-mango salsa it is) comes over to tell him it's all-wrong. She interviews that it's a difficult dish. Ben sneers at her tiny cubes of avocado, saying it will turn into guacamole when it's tossed. Shayna claims to toss it "very gently". Ben interviews that he does not care about the salsa. We're sure talking about salsa a lot. Corey interviews that salsa should take five minutes to make and that Shayna spent the whole morning on it. Jen is more expressive in her interview: "I'm getting kind of annoyed. I mean, it's a damn guacamole with mango in it. It's like, okay, you wanna write a recipe book about it now?" That's pretty funny. Also, I could seriously go for some salsa right now.

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Hell's Kitchen

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