Hell's Kitchen

Episode Report Card
Monty Ashley: B- | Grade It Now!

Oh, here's the customized bumper: it's a cake with a slice cut out of it. And I think the pitchfork is supposed to look like delicious raspberry filling or something, but it just looks like the cake is bleeding. I don't want my dessert to have stigmata!

Back from commercials, the surprise is not a car. Instead, it is a performance by the Pink Spiders, who we're told is Melissa's favorite band. Never heard of them. And now I kind of hate them. Their drummer appears to have crawled out from under a bridge. And why are they doing a song called "Seventeen Candles" at a Sweet Sixteen? I think this was just a ruse to get the kids out of the room.

Back inside, Chef Ramsay has comment cards from all the diners. For the men, 98 percent of the customers said they would come back. For the women... 99 percent. Nice! They celebrate. But what if that last 1 percent was Melissa the Birthday Girl? Well, Chef Ramsay says that both teams are winners, and then Matt pipes up with "Thank you, Chef, for your generosity." Matt, shut up. Or as Chef Ramsay says, "[bleep] generosity, Matt." Both teams are to select candidates. Matt says it'll be him and that he'll be going home. I think he's right.

Back in the dorms, Matt goes straight to his room to pack his bags while the rest of the men sit around and laugh at what a mope he is.

The women sit around the table and discuss things. Shayna thinks it should be Rosann. Rosann thinks it should be Shayna. Corey wants Shayna because she dislikes her in the kitchen. Christina has trouble deciding.

Down in the kitchen, the men have nominated Matt. Chef Ramsay doesn't have much of a poker face on this one: "Good choice. Considering he served dry fish to the birthday girl's mother. I can't think of anything worse, to be honest." Really? You can't think of anything? "Except maybe for sending an undercooked steak to the birthday girl herself." Ah. I see his point, but I still think there are worse things in the world. But the women nominate Shayna instead of Rosann, who they were just told to nominate. Put on the spot, Christina says that she personally would nominate Rosann. So Matt, Shayna, and Rosann all step forward.

Seriously, what is the point of the nominating process? Chef Ramsay has shown that he'll completely ignore it, and the contestants keep thinking they'll be clever and nominate someone other that who he wants up there. The whole "strategizing over who to put on the chopping block" part of the show doesn't really work for me.

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Hell's Kitchen




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