Hell's Kitchen

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Monty Ashley: B | Grade It Now!
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The Rivalry

In the dining room (which is cleaned up with new tablecloths and settings), the men's team lines up. There's a clock visible in the kitchen, but even with the awesome power of HDTV, I can't make out what time it is. But that's okay, because it's time for the nominations! And I can't get too excited, because I think it's obvious that Ben is going home. Even if no one nominates him, Ben is going home, right?

Louross nominates Ben, and emphasizes that he does not fake the funk. Ben nominates Louross. Bobby nominates Petrozza. Petrozza hems and haws through some commercials and finally nominates himself, claiming that he can't pick any of his teammates because they work too hard. He totally co-opted Ben's "look like the bigger man" plan! And Ramsay buys it, telling him that his level of maturity stands out and that he's the most gracious man on the team. Yes, Petrozza truly is Spartacus.

Anyway, Ben's leaving. There's no "defend yourself" part; just the inevitable end.

Now that the red team has five and the blue team only three, Chef Ramsay asks for a volunteer to go over. We won't find out who until next week. The contestants are dismissed, and Petrozza is told that he's a gentleman. "Thank you, chef," he answers. "It means a lot, coming from you." He appears to be sincere, but that would be pretty good as sarcasm.

Next week: Who goes to the blue team? Corey thinks it should be Jen. Jen thinks Corey is a manipulative-ass bitch. I think the power of TiVo has told me who switches teams. And somebody allegedly cuts off their finger and loses the tip in the pancetta.

Montykins is really starting to wonder if any of these clowns has ever seen the inside of a kitchen before. He watches a lot of movies, which he writes about on Monty on Movies. You can email him at montykins@gmail.com if that's your idea of a good time.

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Hell's Kitchen

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