Hell's Kitchen

Episode Report Card
Monty Ashley: D+ | Grade It Now!
More of the Same

Running up to the dorms, Corey breathlessly tells Matt and Corey that she'll be the one who writes things down and they'll be verbalizing. That's the word she used, "verbalizing". It makes me think she's run corporate brainstorming sessions. Matt wants pan-seared lobster, and Christina wants a big steak. Then Matt adds a pork chop. That sounds pretty good. Meanwhile, the blue team's brainstorming is intercut with Jen shouting "BORING!" and "Bzzt! Wrong!" and generally bulldozing her team. Cut to a smiling red team, enjoying their teamwork. Cut back to a sulking Louross looking hate rays at their menu. He feels that it's more a "Jen menu" than a "blue team menu". I understand his point, but hasn't the blue team lost an awful lot so far? I mean, why would a real "blue team" menu be so great? I think both teams should have tried for a "Chef Ramsay menu".

The red team lists a bunch of food (sorry for the lack of transcription, but the words don't quite match the sheet of paper, so I'm punting), ending with a single dessert: "a strawberry shortcake with a chocolate martini shooter on the side." Chef Ramsay thinks it "reads very clever", and that if they can pull it off, it will be good. Matt goes into soppy mode, interviewing that he wishes the three of them were opening a restaurant together and adds, "I'm so happy we're teammates." That's a sentence I cannot say without it sounding sarcastic.

Louross describes the blue menu to Chef Ramsay, and he sounds reasonably enthusiastic, even while saying things like "halibut wrapped with zucchini and squash". Chef Ramsay thinks it sounds ghastly and Louross pretty much agrees with him. Jen looks like she wants to turn around and slap him. Chef Ramsay feels that the blue menu is 70% Jen and 100% hideous. He insists on the blue menu being redone right there, and I can see a lot more dishes on it than we were told about. The red team is conferring during this, so it's good that they're not just standing there gloating the whole time. Not the whole time.

Jen reads out the new menu, and I discover that she pronounces the "L" in "salmon". If I liked her, I could overlook something like that, but she has acted obnoxiously, so now it infuriates me. I never claimed to be fair. The new menu works for Chef Ramsay, and everyone goes into prep. The red team can hear Louross and Jen and generally roll their eyes. And it's time to open Hell's Kitchen!

Wait, what? Already? The teams just settled on their menus! Shouldn't there be a great deal of prep to do? I mean, the old prep won't work, and they have to portion out whole new dishes, but the show is making it look like ten minutes of prep and we're off to the races. That can't be right.

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Hell's Kitchen




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