Hell's Kitchen
The Winner Is Chosen

Episode Report Card
Daniel: B+ | Grade It Now!
Hard to Handle

The Hell's Kitchen season finale opens with clips spanning the season, taking in scenes I'd managed to forget, like Tiffany running after livestock and yelling, "WHO WANTS IT?" And also Tiffany doing everything in every scene. And the editing is giving me epilepsy AND whiplash, so I've got that going for me, which is nice. The narrator is making the case that even though this was the biggest collection of arseholes in HK history (he actually says something about them having problems or something less vague) they all fought really hard to stay, or something. We all know that every season of every reality show has to announce that it's the Most Something Yet, but usually shows opt for "best crop of contestants yet" or some such. The previously-on scenes have been unspooling for about fifteen minutes. At least Hell's Kitchen manages to keep episodes down to a manageable hour, unlike some other reality shows where the only talent required is to be STD-free for at least a few consecutive weeks (*cough* Bachelor Pad *cough*).

We're down to Christina and Justin, and we're wondering if Clemenza can get over his ego to cook for Justin. Clemenza says he's angry he went home -- as opposed to everyone on the team except for Justin? I mean, Clemenza wasn't so dedicated to winning that he'd throw his jacket in the laundry once in a while. He hopes Justin wins, but admits his heart might not really be in it, because what will Justin's money do for him? I don't know, but you'd think pride might compel to not to appear to be such a petulant whiner on television (but if everyone was like that, the reality television industry as we know it would collapse).

The next day, Justin's concerned about Clemenza's attitude. Meanwhile, Christina is excited about having Dana on her team, because she can't imagine cooking without her. Justin's Blue team is having a briefing meeting on the patio and Clemenza has decided to wait in the kitchen because if the team needs him, they should come get him. What is he, thirteen years old? Justin figures he can appease Clemenza long enough to win Hell's Kitchen, so he goes to the kitchen to fetch the bastard.

Prep begins for both teams, Justin's drillmaster attitude contrasting nicely with Christina's lovey-dovey vibe. She tells Red not to call her "Chef" because she won't answer (although she doesn't seem much taken with Dana's saying, "I'm going to call you 'beeyotch'"). Yeah, the boss having the "I'm just your friend, we're all on the same level!" approach ALWAYS works.

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Hell's Kitchen




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