Heroes

Episode Report Card
Couch Baron: C | Grade It Now!
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...And I Don't Care

Sylar has wasted no time attending to the new little bee in his bonnet, as he's rifling through the desk drawer in Nathan's office. He then treats us to another installment in his Conversations With Simpleminded Mothers Who Fucked Up Their Sons With The Single Word "Special" series, as he complains to "Virginia" how Nathan was handed everything in his life, while he actually had to do the work of going out and slicing a bunch of people's heads open, or something. "She" then tries to tell him she knows he didn't mean to kill her, but he denies that, saying he wanted her to die. At this point, I know the feeling. He wonders how he can be anyone or anything when he killed the only person that ever loved him, and "she" realizes that's when he lost himself, even though I thought the show went to such great lengths to tell us it was Elle and Bennet who made him lose himself, but if the show's going to pretend Kristen Bell was never on, it's probably doing her a favor, so why should I complain? Virginia does her best Charlie-pre-Algernon that he can be President, and he agrees, holding up Nathan's toothbrush as he does so, which I wouldn't have thought would be his preferred way of obtaining Nathan's DNA, but I suppose his options are limited at the moment. He changes into the man in question, and then grins, "I won't let you down, Ma." It's no more convincing coming out of Sylar's mouth than it would be the real Nathan's, which is saying a lot.

Matt has made it back to Janice's, and he marvels to Matt Jr. at the size of the place before explaining to him that before he came to be, Mommy was slutting it up with half the men in his department... I mean, "Mommy and Daddy weren't getting along so well." He goes on that he fell in love with Matt Jr., but even still, he can't force Janice to love him again, because they can't use their powers on unsuspecting people. Not to mention it would out-creep even anything we've seen so far on Dollhouse. Janice then arrives and happily greets Matt Jr., and follows up by awkwardly and emotionally greeting her ex-husband, but before things can go any further, Matt senses that agents have followed her and are just down the street. He says he can "hold them off" for the moment but they have to move, and after Janice stutters about her parents' summer house, Matt encourages her to pack immediately. She wonders what he's going to do, and he starts to babble anxiously before saying definitively that he wants to be a part of his son's life. Janice opines they have a lot to talk about, but sensibly decides it can wait and heads off...

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Heroes

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