Claire's carrying her box (and one duffel bag and a messenger bag) up the stairs in her dorm room hall as the episode title chyron -- "Chapter One: Orientation" -- appears behind her on the wall. And she's in Arlington, Virginia. Seriously all I can see in her box are stuffed animals and a trophy. If you pack that light, Claire, you leave that crap at home. She enters her room, where one half is already decked out all pink and the other side is hers. Claire's crazy, overprepared roommate Annie comes in carrying a stack of textbooks, introduces herself and immediately starts bugging Claire about why she was so private that Annie couldn't friend her on Facebook before meeting and how she has a life plan and Claire should have one, too. I hate her, and mostly that's just because the show is stupid enough to make her so over-the-top that she puts Tracy Flick to shame. But we all know subtlety isn't part of this show's vocabulary. Anyway, nothing important is established in this scene other than Annie being batshit. Oh, and Claire got her GED, but got into this amazing school that cannot be named anyway, because her "scores" were high. Claire tells Annie that her mom breeds championship show dogs (really? Mr. Muggles?) and her dad works for the government. Annie also tells Claire she needs to place into some class at a placement test today. This is all a dumb storyline that goes nowhere and I'm annoyed at this show for making me recap it.
Episode Report CardDeAnn Welker: C | 1564 USERS: B-
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