Episode Report Card
Sara M: C+ | Grade It Now!
Crystal Clear
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!

Probst chooses to recap the entire season thus far on the previously segment, which I hate. He also heavily favors Kota as usual, which I hate even more. At least this week he actually admits that Fang won two challenges. One clip they used to illustrate Fang's suckitude was when Ace missed his team's ball last week, which actually helped them, so it's clear that the editors and producers and Probst are simply watching a different show than I am. I do like Matty's never-before-seen comment that Fang is "the goof troop."

Fang returns to camp from Tribal Council. No one seems especially upset to lose GC. In fact, they're in positively high spirits about it. Ace tells us that "GC had to go," as if he pulled off some sort of big-time strategic move when really, GC just quit. It had nothing to do with Ace at all, unless GC's reason for quitting was that he couldn't stand to listen to that fake accent anymore. Ace continues that he's got Sugar in his pocket, which he's really fond of saying, and now he's looking for a member of Fang to make a deal with to save his ass until the merge.

It's the next morning, and Kelly didn't sleep well. The show included her saying this just to show us that Kelly can't do anything well, ever. Matty suddenly has all kinds of feelings for his girlfriend, and he says she's his "driving force" for being out here. Yeah, that's probably because she's the person who cast him on the show. He wants to see this game through to the end, but he knows that being on this tribe isn't going to make that easy. So he tells us that if someone were to approach him with a good plan, he'd "for sure" jump on board. Why does someone else have to have the plan, Matty? Can't you think of something?

Matty and Ace go off together. Ace puts on his "woe is me" act, saying he doesn't want to be blindsided when he's sure the old Fang will eventually vote him out. Somehow, this turns into a deal where Matty won't vote against either Ace or Sugar until the merge and Ace won't vote against Matty or Ken, as if Ace's vote even matters. Matty swears on his girlfriend's life, while Ace swears on his mother's. Swearing on people's lives is so stupid and immature, but whatever. I have a feeling Matty isn't very smart. He just made a deal with a guy who has everything to lose while he has nothing to lose. Why? And he'll probably stick to it, while we all know Ace won't. For as little as Matty seems to think of his tribe mates, he's probably the dumbest one there.

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