High School Reunion

Episode Report Card
Wendola: B- | 552 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
Rumors and compliments

LT: Oh, if he likes it that's no good at all.
Wendola: Chris, is it true you direct porn?
JS: Amy, is it true you've lost so much weight that you're invisible on this show now?

Patricia says in an interview that she would like to know what rumors are "swirling about" her. Patricia, is it true that the producers are running out of things for you to say? And that they made everyone write down those questions just so you'll have some cue cards? Someone is shown writing down a question for Patricia: "Trish, is it true that you've kissed les-- [rest of question blocked]." The rest of the question is either "lesbians" or else something like "less than five guys." Either way, the question is: can she do anything with her mouth other than gossip? Do we care?

Later that morning, Nicole is listening at the door of Patricia, Natasha, and Maya's room. The three are talking about the previous night, when Summer pulled down Dan's shorts while he was sleeping and put cherries in his mouth, too. Cue slow-motion footage of Summer sort of poking something into Dan B.'s sleeping mouth. The hell? They didn't mention the cherry stuff during the last episode. Oh, great: they're pulling that selective-memory editing on us. I hate that. What other stuff are they withholding? Maybe Holly gave Dave a good hard spanking on the massage table? And then they'll break out the slow-motion video to prove it? And we're supposed to be okay with that? Well, actually -- we would be. But it's the principle of the thing. Anyway. Patricia snipes that the whole Barbato De-Pantsing Incident With Bonus Cherry-Feeding Action really "frightened" her. Natasha says in an interview that she was really mad when she heard what Summer had done. "It could have humiliated him," she said. Yeah, wasn't Ben looking on and saying Dan B. was "hung like a horse"? Because having an entire television audience know about the impressiveness of your cock is a painful nightmare. "I don't like that Summer did that to him. At all," Natasha tells Maya and Patricia. "I'm going to do something to her about it." Patricia says that the note Summer got seemed to give her a lot of confidence. "It's time to take some of it away," says Patricia. Patricia learned from watching Passions that it's a good idea to state your sinister intentions clearly.

High School Reunion

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