Lost
Homecoming

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Clarify me, Claire

Jack's sharpening a knife, which I wonder if, on the island, constitutes "prepping for surgery." Kate strolls up and says he looks hungry and tosses him a...well, I don't know. Let's say it's a mango. And she says Locke told them about the Ethan thing. "Why do you think he wants her back?" she asks, and Jack says he doesn't know. She came by to suggest that Jack break out the nine-millimetres he has stashed away in the air marshal's case, but Jack won't do it, quoting the statistics about how a gun's far more likely to shoot a fellow castaway than someone coming to kill you. "I'm not putting guns in untrained hands," says Jack, although there are plenty of trained hands on the island. Shit, Locke, Kate, Sayid, and Sawyer. There you go! Posse up!

Boone and Locke and Sayid are rigging up some A-Team-esque defences, if the A-Team wasted time setting up trip wires that drop a bag of the castaways' recyclables on your head. Locke orders up four of those bad boys around the perimeter of the camp, and I have to say those look like an awful lot of effort for a trap that will only work if Ethan trips a wire and then stands still in one exact spot. And Sayid's got plans to keep the sentry fires burning, and he's got men volunteering for guard duty. So Boone volunteers as well, and Sayid can barely disguise his skepticism and says "okay," but Locke's way more encouraging and says the camp's counting on Boone, like, R.I.P., castaways.

Nightfall, and Charlie's bugging Jack by suggesting that they should move Claire to a cave on the mountains since she might be safer there, and I don't know if Charlie could make any less sense whenever he opens his mouth but I do know that he's really starting to get on my nerves. Jack's too, although he softens a bit when Charlie reveals that he feels guilty about what happened to Claire. Jack just assures him that nothing will happen to her now, which is a promise I don't think Jack can make.

Flashback to dinner with Lucy and her dad, who's played by Hey! It's That Guy! Jim Piddock, who you may remember as being married to Mickey in A Mighty Wind. He says that Charlie is the most impressive person he and Lucy have ever had for dinner, which makes me feel really sorry for them. And he says that he used to be in a band, called Protestant Reformation. I'll allow that that's bad, but you don't get to snicker at that when you're in a band called Driveshaft. So Frank drones on about how the band broke up when he got married and Lucy was on the way, and yeah yeah, Summer of '69, and you've got to think about the future and all that, and this is of course Making Charlie Think. So Frank asks when the new Driveshaft record is coming out, and Charlie fortunately says the word "hiatus." He says his brother Liam just had a baby and so is taking some time off. "Quite a lot of time off, actually. It's been a year since we were together," he says, the bitterness in his voice evident. He says he's thinking of working on a solo project, since he and Liam don't keep in touch and there's been some problems with royalties. Frank busts out the sorry-I-asked face while Lucy looks sweetly concerned. Then Charlie admits that Driveshaft might be dead. He could just say their new record is called "Chinese Democracy," and that way he could have like several years to work on it in peace.

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Lost

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