Broken Hearts

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | 9 USERS: A-

The whole thing is stupid, the whole thing happens with literally every TV show and the only difference is how loud and mobbed it gets, which bears a direct proportion to how big the buzz gets. It has nothing to do with actual critique or criticism, and everything to do with self-labeling.

(And maybe -- just maybe, just a little bit -- with relief that you're not so dumb for hating the entire Brody Family half of the show or finding it boring, because you are here for guns and romance and spycraft and people saying swears and not for the actual show, which are both reasons that are actually why it's critically acclaimed and why you heard everybody talking about it in the first place, that you now have the crowd's permission to sniff at, because it's finally tipped over.)

Don't get me wrong, it's a crappy episode. Maybe the worst one of the entire series, which sucks: There shouldn't be any crappy episodes, of any series. There's no good reason for that. But you can say that without it meaning anything particularly epic beyond that, because anything else is oversimplifying, and for reasons that have nothing to do with the show.

The second this show actually started coming up at the dinner table or the bar, I felt my stomach start to cramp, because I knew what would come next: The dorky internet hipster race to be the first person to be over it, the first person to pause their TiVo at the exact apex of Fonzie's jump and say, "I have won." And if you don't understand why that entire mindset pisses me off more than anything on this planet, you really haven't been paying attention.


Saul: "Dar Adal, my creepy old friend played by F. Murray Abraham. I knew I'd find you here having waffles for lunch. It's Wacky Waffle Thursday, after all. The day you eat breakfast like its lunch!"
Dar Adal: "Being a black-bag assassin means that, as I get older, I like to know I can count on certain things."
Saul: "I went to your house. No longer your house."
Dar Adal: "No point anymore. I have to move, constantly. I miss the Cold War."
Saul: "What an 'old-school TV spy' thing to say!"
Dar Adal: "I miss the rules. Soviets didn't shoot us, we didn't shoot them. But this bunch?"
Saul: "Thought you retired."
Dar Adal: "We all try that. Doesn't work. Spies aren't humans anymore."

Saul: "So yeah, speaking of that. Peter Quinn. Don't fuck with me, either. You got on the #7 bus and had a nice long talk with him last night around eight."

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