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We'll Never Have Paris

The Cottages report back to House that everything came back fine. Cameron thinks there's nothing wrong with the guy. Foreman says that the surgeon can't do an exploratory surgery today. House tells him to go back and tell the guy to make room in his schedule, and Cameron voices her objection. House asks Cameron what her diagnosis is, then, and Cameron says she doesn't have one; she just doesn't think they should cut a guy open without knowing if he's even sick. House says that Stacy is a lawyer, and therefore "very convincing," and that if she thinks Mark is sick, then he's sick. Schedule the surgery.

Stacy is very convincing indeed: she managed to get Mark to consent to the surgery (unless, of course, House just drugged him again and had Stacy sign the consent forms while her husband was unconscious, which we know for a fact they're both willing to do).

Stacy pretends to be a high-powered lawyer by talking into a small tape recorder about "minority opinions" and other lawyerly things. She's interrupted by a cup of coffee, made just the way she used to like it -- double milk, no sugar. These days, she tells House, she likes sugar. One hopes she also likes air, because it's very obvious that's all the prop cup is filled with as Sela Ward flings it around. House takes a seat beside her and starts tapping his cane on the floor. Stacy says that annoys her, probably because it reminds her of the fact that she's the reason why House has a cane to tap at all. House says that people wait in waiting rooms because they think that the closer they are to the operating room, the more they care. Stacy says she's not moving until everybody sees her. I'm not exactly sure what that means, because I don't know if we're in the waiting room, or just a random hallway. They look exactly the same. Let's move on. House asks Stacy if she's "doing" anybody besides her husband, saying that the question is medical in nature, since it will show that Mark's paranoia is justified and therefore not a symptom. Stacy says that if that were House's only motive for asking the question, he would have sent one of the Cottages to ask it, calling them "Mandingos," and I really hope she's using that term to imply that the Cottages are like slaves to their boss, as opposed to it being her clever name for Foreman. It's pretty racist both ways, but a great deal more so if it's the latter. It's really too bad those two broke up, because with House's proven prejudice against Asians and Stacy's against black people, they really did make a perfect couple. But anyway, Stacy says that House asked the question personally because he was hoping that if her answer was yes, it would mean that she would sleep with him. Stacy sure does think a lot of herself, doesn't she? I'm surprised that House can even fit on that couch, what with Stacy's giant ego taking up so much space. Hell, I'm surprised anyone else can even fit in the hospital.

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