Episode Report Card
Sara M: B- | Grade It Now!
Doin' It And Doin' It And Doin' It Well

Foreman notices scars on LL's back as he prepares LL for what will probably be a painful spine-puncture thing. LL says that he was shivved his first month in jail, and that he got his revenge as soon as he healed up. At least, I think that's what he said; those fake teeth aren't doing LL's already marbled-mouthed sense of diction any favors. LL asks Foreman why they don't just let him die, and Foreman says he's different from LL. Oops! A nurse told LL all about how Foreman stood around and watched LL die before, so he knows that's not exactly true. Surely it was Evil Nurse Brenda who ratted on Foreman, hoping to get him killed as revenge for his pushiness during the meningitis epidemic. As Foreman sticks a needle into LL's back, he asks if there's any family history of mental illness. LL says he heard that his dad was crazy, but that he never met him. His mother was a drug addict, leaving him to raise his brother. Foreman assumes that the brother is in jail, too, and LL bristles and says that he's a good kid and that Foreman shouldn't judge what he doesn't know. But...but...Foreman's black! LL's black! They both have criminal records! Don't they automatically know everything about each other? This show needs to stop sending me mixed signals. LL's brother hasn't seen or talked to his brother since LL went to jail, which LL thinks is ungrateful, since he did change the guy's diapers and everything. "Can you imagine your whole life being about the worst thing you ever did?" LL says. Foreman can, because in this episode, his is. But before he can be sympathetic, he remembers that LL murdered four people.

House is most displeased to find that instead of leaving files on his chair, Cameron is now leaving her entire body in it. House asks her what she wants with that gesture, and Cameron says she "needs" lung lavage for Cindy, since none of the other tests have been "definitive." I don't know what Cameron's definition of "definitive" is, but it probably involves a hand with the words "TERMINAL LUNG CANCER" written on it slapping her across the face. I volunteer my hands if that is the case. House says that a biopsy would be definitive, but Cameron says that's "invasive and unnecessary." Invasive and unnecessary for Cameron, that is. I'm sure Cindy would agree to it, if she had any idea what was going on with her health. House says that Cameron's just trying to avoid the obvious as long as she can, and that he's not going to approve her silly lavage. "Why?" Cameron snaps, springing to her feet and marching over to House. "Because it's me?" Holy Christ, Cameron, not everything is about you. Some things are about what's best for your patient, who might want to know that she possibly has terminal cancer so that she can fucking plan accordingly. "I'm over you," Cameron volunteers. "I've jumped on the bandwagon. I hate you, okay?" "Great! Let's treat her," House says. Cameron goes from angry to whiny in .03 seconds and asks why House will fight tooth-and-nail for a Death Row inmate, but won't give a pretty young white girl a second look. House doesn't answer, because he knows this is stupid. Cameron says that she just wants House to treat LL and Cindy the same, which I'm sure he would if their cases were the same. "One test," she begs. House walks over to the lightboard and says that Cameron is the one going through the five stages of grief instead of the person who's actually dying. She just passed anger and went straight into bargaining. I'm sure Cindylou Who would be going through her stages, too, if she had a doctor who didn't lie to her. House tells Cameron that she can have her lavage if she does two of House's Clinic hours. Oh, great. Give Cameron another chance to find a sad sack case to bother us all with next week.

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