House
Acceptance

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Sara M: B- | Grade It Now!
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Doin' It And Doin' It And Doin' It Well

Chase says that LL's brain looks normal. Foreman asks Chase how he would describe Foreman to people. "Insecure," Chase says. Foreman asks, if Chase were setting Foreman up on a blind date, how would he describe Foreman to the girl? Would he call Foreman "the black guy," "the neurologist," or "the car thief"? Why not all three, which I'm guessing is Foreman's official character description. Chase just laughs that LL is starting to get to Foreman.

Cameron's non-invasive lavage requires her to stick a tube up into Cindylou Who's nose, fill her lungs with liquid, and suck it back up. The test results reveal no sign of infection, and Wilson says that just leaves the biopsy.

Cuddy has changed into her normal cleavage-baring attire and is furious to find that LL is still a patient in her hospital. House lies that they need him to stick around for observation purposes, which Cuddy doesn't believe for one second, since Stacy tattled to her that House thought LL was still sick. And that is why we don't trust Stacy, House. I hope you learned something today. "So much for attorney-client privilege," House grumbles. Cuddy hilariously throws her hands out and says "I'm the client, you moron." She's sending LL back to prison. House says that he has a court order. Cuddy says that the court order simply says that a doctor has to declare LL healthy in order for him to return to jail. It doesn't say which doctor. She should call up Cameron, then, because in her world, you're healthy until proven sick one hundred and three times over.

House catches up to Cuddy in LL's room, where the patient is alternately moaning and screaming in pain. Cuddy asks whether it's a throbbing pain, or an imaginary one because LL doesn't want to go back to Death Row. LL says he feels like he's being stabbed in the gut, and House lifts the sheet to take a look. "Oh, so everybody lies except a convicted murderer?" Cuddy scoffs, in what is quickly becoming the House equivalent of Star Trek's "I'm a doctor, not [an object/occupation]!" line. What Cuddy doesn't know (but we do, thanks to the Magic School Bus Cam) is that something is seeping through a hole in LL's intestines. Really, I think we were all better off not seeing that. House pulls back LL's sheet to reveal a nice bloody mess coming from LL's shorts. Ladies, I think you can sympathize with me here that getting your first period is always scary and embarrassing, so it must be pretty bad to have it happen in front of half the police force and doctor staff like that. Welcome to womanhood, LL! House says he doesn't think LL is faking the pool of blood, and asks Cuddy what she thinks. Cuddy doesn't respond, but if she had, it simply would have been to say: "Curses! Foiled again!" as she shook her fist in the air.

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House

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