House
House

Episode Report Card
Sara M: B+ | 1531 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
Flakes On A Plane

On that assumption, Wilson pronounces the case closed and leads the women out. He tells Robin that someone should watch over Fran for the next two hours. Both Fran and Robin stutter excuses for why this can't happen, but Robin's Heart Of Gold shows up again, and she asks Wilson if it's important for someone to stay with Fran. "We just don't like people to be alone after they leave here," Wilson says, forgetting to add that this is because they usually can't take three steps out of PPTH without going all stiff or crashing through a window in the lobby or having bloody poop they don't want to tell anyone about. Or collapsing on the ground with a seizure, as Fran is now doing. Wilson attempts to treat her for all of two seconds before calling for help, says he has no idea what's going on, and then yells for House, the only person at PPTH who's capable of doing anything.

But House can't answer Wilson's cries, because he's boarding a plane! Hooray! At long last! I am rubbing my hands in delight and anticipation. So far, I am not disappointed. While some random guy pushes a wheelchair-bound House through the airport-plane-connector-tunnel thing, House complains to Cuddy that they took his "antique vintner's cane" away at the gate, citing the hidden corkscrew as a security risk. House will have to wait until the plane lands back in the United States to get his cane back and play James Bond with its hidden gadgets. This displeases him, but considering how often House uses that cane as a weapon and the fact that he was recently on the No Fly List, I think the airport made the right decision. Suddenly, House turns to a woman holding a fussing child and orders her to give it some sleep-inducing Benadryl before House kills it. Oh, House! He says what everyone single person on every plane with a small child on board wishes he could. Cuddy mutters something about House bringing goodwill to another continent, even though the blonde white woman House just yelled at is probably not a citizen of Singapore. This does give Cuddy a way to exposit what she and House are doing in Singapore while the entire population of PPTH dies without House there to save them: House gave a speech at some WHO conference. I don't know why Cuddy had to go with him, especially since she was helpless to make him give a speech longer than three minutes ("it may have been short, but it had girth") or control his hotel room expenditures. She mentions his "spiteful" room service order ("I was hungry!"); his three-hundred-dollar bottle of wine, no doubt taken from one of those minifridges in which a candy bar costs fifty dollars ("I was thirsty!"); and one hundred and twenty dollars for "video services" ("I was lonely!"). House reassures Cuddy that he'll take care of the extra five hundred dollars he spent.

House

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