House
Airborne

Episode Report Card
Sara M: B | 1 USERS: B
YOU GRADE IT
Flakes On A Plane

On the plane, the Korean is still barfing. The blonde girl watches him puke over the armrest until Cuddy finally wises up and closes the drapes. Meanwhile, those disapproving passengers from before can't take the puking and the smell anymore, and they abandon first class to sit with the peasants. I wonder if they'll sue the airline for this, like that guy who had to sit next to a corpse during a long flight after a woman suddenly died in the economy section. He was angry because they allowed the dead woman's family to come up and grieve, and their wailing interrupted his enjoyment of the in-flight entertainment and kept him awake. The blonde again confronts House about the Korean, scared that Cuddy was right about a possible deadly pandemic after all. House just tells her to turn and face a different direction, because his amazing doctor skills tell him she's about to barf and he'd rather she not do it on him. Although, honestly, even barf would be an improvement over that horrible yellow Hawaiian shirt he's wearing. Of course, House is right, and the blonde turns and barfs. How did he know that she was about to barf when she didn't? The thing about barfing is that your body takes, like, ten minutes to prepare itself before it actually does it. So you usually know it's on its way. Unless you're in bed with food poisoning and feeling like that all the time, in which case the barf surprises you and you have to put your hand over your mouth and run to the bathroom and even then you don't quite make it. The girl pukes up something bright yellow, and even manages to get some on House's shoes despite his efforts to remain untouched. Cuddy's barf alarm goes off in first class and she runs back, but before she can point to this as a sign that she's right about the Korean having something contagious, House says that it's natural for humans to throw up if they smell or see someone else doing it. But that's not what's happening here, as Cuddy lifts the back of the blonde girl's shirt and sees that she has a distinctive rash. "I wasn't expecting that," House has to admit.

While Cuddy tends to the blonde, House announces to the entire plane that he needs Cottages so he can have someone off of whom to bounce his crazy ideas. He recruits a kid with floppy blond hair who can say "crikey, mate" to be his AirChase, ordering him to agree with everything House says. AirChase agrees. AirForeman is some guy who doesn't speak English, which is fitting, since the real Foreman might as well not speak English either for all the lines he gets. And AirCameron is a woman House instructs to be morally outraged at everything he says. She responds by bitchily telling House that he's about to use permanent marker on his makeshift whiteboard, the plane's movie screen. Also, I believe she's wearing a sweater vest. And she can do a raised eyebrow like no one's business. But will she sleep with AirChase?

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