House

Episode Report Card
Sara M: C- | 1649 USERS: B-
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Flashback

As we see House approaching the front door to his apartment, he narrates that he went there after Wilson talked to him but before he went to work. He tries to open the front door, only to find that Alvie is inside his apartment standing on a ladder in front of the door, thus blocking the way in. Wow, I really didn't think we'd ever see him again. He'd better not bring all the other mental hospital people with him. One is enough. "You let him stay at your place?" Nolan asks, surprised. "Not exactly," House grumbles. He's finally able to enter his own apartment, where he finds his furniture covered with sheets and the walls taped off and partially painted. Yeah. What bipolar guy in a manic enough phase to decide to paint someone's apartment (that he also broke into) without asking first also has the patience to prepare it for said painting? I saw a manic person try to paint once and she wouldn't tape anything off and ended up getting more paint on the floor than the wall. But anyway, House takes in the scene, then asks Alvie why he's there. Alvie says House left his bathroom window unlocked (dumbass move, House) so he decided to move in, since he's having "immigration issues" that prevent him from being able to return to his old neighborhood. Wow, House was doubly stupid, to both leave his bathroom window open and tell Alvie his address. I guess this is what he deserves. Alvie is painting House's apartment to try to "earn" his keep, saying the first week he was there, he made House dinner, but House never actually came home. The second week, he "organized" House's belongings, but still, House never showed up. Apparently not worried about his friend and where he could be, Alvie decided to spend this week painting. House asks Alvie where he organized his coffee table, as it is not in its usual spot. Alvie says he had to pawn the table and some of House's other possessions to buy the paint, which is an expensive "custom color." Also, Alvie doesn't like okra. You know, I really didn't realize how much I missed Alvie until he came back. He's, like, the only fun thing about this show this season. Everyone else is such a drag now. To show us all how far House has come since his mental hospital days when he was freestyle rapping with and hugging Alvie, House tries to kick him out. Such progress! House tells Nolan that he stopped by his apartment again later that day, only to find Alvie still there and his ceiling the lovely color of magenta. He claims he then brought Alvie to work with him only to "protect" his apartment from further destruction/girly colors, but Nolan thinks he could have just locked Alvie out or sent him to a movie or something less personal. "You chose his company deliberately," Nolan says. House says it must because Alvie makes for such a good Wilson substitute, since they're both so alike when they "rap about the hood." The fact that we aren't seeing Wilson do this right now is such a wasted opportunity. Nolan thinks Alvie is more of a distraction than a substitute. I agree! Remember how Alvie was a distraction from the ridiculousness of that season premiere? Nolan says he's still trying to find out what Alvie is distracting House from.

House

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