House

Episode Report Card
Sara M: C- | 1644 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
Flashback

As she lies in the MRI (OF DOOOM!!), the Cottages exposit that Sydney has a fluid build-up in her lungs. House thinks it's diabetes insipidus (this is not the same as the diabetes that Stacy from The Baby-sitters Club books had or the diabetes that fat people get, but something that has to do with kidney function) and asks what that and the areas of the brain that control things like foot paralysis and incontinence have in common. Apparently, the answer is spongiform encephalitis, and the only cure for that is to cut out the affected part of Sydney's brain, which also happens to be where all of her long-term memories are stored, thus making her amnesia permanent. Nolan loses his patience here, saying that House can't tell him that being "cavalier" with his patient's past has nothing to do with his issues with his own past. House asks why his therapist isn't being nurturing. Nolan says that's not in the manual, and after a year of therapy, House should know by now that he's supposed to talk about things that affected him and how they made him feel, so if he's going to keep claiming that Sydney's case means nothing, they have nothing to talk about. Nolan thumbs through his copy of Wooden Boat magazine instead. Okay, Wooden Boat magazine is amazing. I want a subscription. Oh, hold on a minute -- it's a real publication? And Sydney thinks her life is boring? I thought that was just a hilarious prop. House asks if he's being charged for this time. Nolan says he sure is (hey -- Nolan has to fund his wooden boat projects somehow), and House stands up to leave. As he turns, Nolan notices a bruise on the back of his arm. How could he even see that? That room is even darker than it was before. "I fell," House says. Of course, he doesn't actually remember falling because he was drunk. Nolan says the bruise is the shape of the tip of a boot. House instadiagnoses his bruise as the result of a bar fight, started when he said something inappropriate to a bar patron. He doesn't remember it happening, but he's been through this enough times. Nolan says if House is getting so drunk that he gets in fights and doesn't remember them, something is definitely wrong. Yeah -- the season is ending soon, so House must Have A Problem. It happens EVERY TIME. And then it's over by like the third episode of the next season. Don't worry about it, Nolan. Nolan thinks House is punishing himself for something by intentionally doing things that will get him hurt. "What did you screw up?" he asks. House sincerely says he doesn't know, then admits "there may be a problem." NO SHIT. Why is he even in therapy if he's only now realizing there might be a problem? Didn't he realize this in the beginning of the season already? Why are we going backwards? I don't get it.

House

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