An endlessly cheerful special education teacher named Sara (AWESOME NAME!) comes to House after barfing blood and collapsing during class. House hates cheerful, so he decides to use her case to test his new boss Cameron, asking for permission to do increasingly insane tests with less and less evidence of their necessity. Cameron lets him do them all. When House cuts Sara's skull open looking for brain damage, he realizes that when her blood pressure is low and Cuddy's baby is crying its lungs out over a speaker phone, Sara actually gets annoyed. That, combined with Cuddy's baby's spit up, shows House the way: some duct that only exists when we're in fetus form that allows blood to bypass our lungs (since we don't really need them when there's no air around) stayed open in Sara and never disappeared from her body like it should have. When she's under stress, her blood pressure rises, forcing the duct open. Because of this, the left side of her brain doesn't get as much blood as it should, causing her to react to stress by becoming un-stressed. It was only when her blood pressure dropped during the open skull procedure that she was able to react to stress normally. Her heart is fixed and she'll be fine. Hooray! They didn't kill Sara off!
And in other plotlines, Foreman just can't resist switching Hadley's placebo for the real Huntington's drug, Cameron can't resist saying yes to all of House's crazy whims, and now that Cuddy has plenty of time to spend with her new baby, she realizes that she doesn't feel anything for her. She contemplates returning the baby to the baby store, only to finally bond with Rachel when she's at her breaking point.
A bunch of kids play in a classroom that looks like it's filled with smoke. That, combined with the low-tech looking classroom and the dress of its students and teachers made me seriously think we were watching a flashback to the 60s. But no, it's just my arch-nemesis Director Deran at work again, muting all the color and adding a smoky effect for no reason. And I guess it's retro day at the school. It's also arts and crafts day, and from the way the kids are behaving, I'm figuring either it's a special education class or maybe they're all a little loopy from all the smoke. One kid, Johnny, notices that Zeke has a new aide named Miss Cindy and asks what happened to the old one. Teacher answers that she got married, so I guess that means she doesn't have to work anymore. Are we sure this isn't a 60s flashback? Johnny's disability involves a lack of tact, as he asks his teacher why she's still single. She puts the blame right on Johnny, saying she spends too much time "loving" him to meet a man. She then tickles him. My teachers never tickled me, but I wasn't in special education, either. Of course, Johnny asks his teacher to marry him, but she turns him down because there are still some young female teachers who don't sleep with their underage students. In disappointment, Johnny accidentally spills green glitter on his neighbor's art project. She reacts to disappointment much differently, and pees in her pants. And the teacher reacts to the disappointment of having to clean this mess up by coughing up blood and passing out. Way to leave a huge mess for Miss Cindy to clean up, Teach. Is this some kind of special education teacher hazing ritual?
House enters the cafeteria and looks around for someone to pay for his food. Everyone at PPTH knows to avoid the cafeteria when House is around by now, though, so he's forced to limp off with a covert bagel. Cameron appears out of nowhere and lectures him about paying for his food, then tries to give him his latest case. Wow, she's been Cuddy for all of two seconds and already she's a huge pain in the ass. You know, when Miss Cindy took over for Miss-now-Mrs. Whoever, she didn't pull this kind of power tripping bullshit. Cameron might want to take a few lessons from her. When House notices that the case file Cameron is holding did not come from the ER, she informs him that Cuddy is taking some time off to be with her baby and Cameron has been chosen to fill in for her. That's really something that Cuddy should tell House herself instead of leaving it to the person who used to work for him. But obviously, she's too chickenshit to do so. House says he's sure they'll butt heads and then have sex. "That's why I took the job," Cameron says without hesitating. It throws House off enough for her to hand him the file and take off. House makes sure to check her ass out as she goes. I still can't believe all of PPTH hasn't mutinied over Cuddy's latest leadership decision.