House

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It's All In Your Head

Loss of bowel control means that House's diagnosis was wrong and Donny is getting worse. House makes a duty=doody joke that no one finds particularly entertaining (including me -- that was even below House's usual third grade brand of humor) while the Cottages get to diagnosing. Cameron suggests Wilson's disease, but House says it would have affected Donny's liver by now. Foreman says maybe it did, and the liver is so far gone that "the labs look normal." Um ... how does that work, exactly? Anyway, they don't have anything else to go on, so they decide to treat Donny for it without even trying to confirm the diagnosis.

Chase has ducked out of work yet again, this time to go to confession. It takes him a minute, but he's able to tell the priest that he killed someone. "But it was the right thing to do," he adds. Oooh, sorry, Chase -- the priest doesn't see it that way. He says who lives and who dies is not Chase's decision to make. "Sometimes in the operating room it feels like it. I'm a doctor," Chase adds at the end, just in case the priest thought Chase was a plumber who likes to hang out in operating rooms. "You should know more than anybody that human life is sacred," the priest says. I want to feel for Chase here, but his frowny face looks a lot like Beaker from The Muppet Show. Chase asks if a genocidal dictator's life is sacred. The priest must have totally figured out who Chase is and who he killed by now, and is no doubt thinking about how he's going to phone the reporter from Everything About Everything Ever Press as soon as possible. Chase begs the priest to forgive him, but the priest says this is too big for that. "What do I have to do?" Chase asks, his voice starting to break; "what does god need me to do?" "You have to turn yourself in to the police," the priest says. Chase doesn't like that plan at all. "I did the right thing. There has to be another way," he says. The priest says if he wants absolution, turning himself in and facing the consequences is the only way. The priest is not helpful and kind of a dick. I think Chase should just keep confessing to different priests at different churches until one tells him what he wants to hear.

House spends the night in his office, thinking. Cuddy stops by to tell him that she's signing off on his 120 hours after all. House thinks she's letting him skip the rounds because she's uncomfortable around him. Cuddy denies this, even after House says being around her makes him "feel funny." He appears to be kidding, but not really. "I was kinda getting into the whole hot-for-teacher thing," he says. Really? Didn't they have, like, three seconds of rounds together? Cuddy asks House if he's "sure" he's okay. House says it was a "false alarm" but doesn't go into the details. "What about us?" he asks. Where is this coming from? They've had minimal interaction all season and no sexual tension in the few scenes they have had together, and now all of the sudden, this? Huh. Cuddy says the way things are between them now is the same as ever; "you press my buttons, I press yours." And that gives House his epiphany moment. He sets off for Donny's room, taking an extra second to invade Cuddy's personal space and say "you do make me feel funny."

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House

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