House

Episode Report Card
Sara M: C | 1015 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
You Can't Win If You Don't Play

Murphy Brown and her lawyer meet with Cuddy. Murphy Brown has to use a cane to walk now, thanks to her daughter's terrible hospital. Does Cuddy own stock in a cane company or something? Because House has to use a cane to walk after having her as his doctor, too. Apparently, everyone Cuddy treats ends up using a cane. Or missing a hand, like her handyman who fell off her roof in Season Two.

Cuddy says House doesn't need to be here, since she's sure Murphy's lawsuit is about their fight and not the treatment she received at PPTH. That treatment certainly doesn't seem to have made an impact on Murphy's appetite, though. I love you, Candice Bergen, but if you're going to appear on TV and weigh like 50 pounds more than you used to and be put next to emaciated Lisa Edelstein, I have no choice but to comment on it. Cuddy says she wants to work things out with Murphy without lawyers present, seeing as how it is Mother's Day in a few days (Happy Mother's Day, Mom! I love you!). Murphy apparently agrees, and the lawyer leaves the room.

Cuddy says Murphy might be mad at her for suggesting she move in with her, but it's obvious that Murphy is struggling during her recovery and at Cuddy's house, she'll have Cuddy to take care of her and Murphy can spend time with her grand-daughter. "Win-win!" she says. That sounds like it's lose-lose to me. And to Murphy, who insists that this isn't personal but about the suffering she endured at the hands of PPTH and her "uncaring daughter." Okay, bitch. An uncaring daughter wouldn't offer to let you stay in her home. But maybe she learned not to care about family from the woman who is suing her own daughter's hospital that also saved her life.

"What do you want?" Cuddy sighs. Murphy demands $20,000, enough to hire someone to help her in her own home. And then she asks for another $10,000 to install one of those stair lifts, even though they only cost like $1,500 at the most and those commercials always say that most people are covered by their insurance. Cuddy tells her mother that if the hospital board hears about Murphy's possible lawsuit, they'll investigate Murphy's treatment and Cuddy and House will probably lose their licenses as a result. That's why Cuddy would rather believe that this lawsuit is due to personal reasons rather than her mother being ungrateful and kind of evil. And money-grubbing. Murphy has the grace to look ashamed, but before she can speak, House bursts in with a tray of medical supplies and offers to take out Murphy's shiny new hip and replace it with her deadly broken old one. He makes a crack about Cuddy's bedroom habits, at which point Murphy grabs for her cane and leaves, the lawsuit un-dropped.

House

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