House
Control

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Sara M: C+ | Grade It Now!
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Women Have No Control

Carly wakes up from her surgery, looking remarkably healthy for someone who just got a new heart. House brings her some fried chicken, figuring that the strict diet she's supposed to be on while recovering won't do her eating disorder any favors. Neither will binging and the subsequent desire to purge, but whatever. Carly asks House why he fought so hard for her. "You're my patient," House says. Meanwhile, someone else's patient, whose heart crapped out due to no fault of his or her own, dies without getting a transplant, so great ethics there, House. On the other hand, I don't know how morally right it is that a committee of strangers can decide to let Carly die just because her psychiatric condition makes her more of a "risk" and therefore less deserving than someone else. It's a really, really fine ethical line. "Don't screw it up," House says. Carly nods. She'll have to give her company over to a man who can handle it without killing himself and then go get married and have some babies and cook a lot. And if that's not fulfilling enough, she can always go back to being Kiefer's office bitch. Just as long as a man is in CONTROL.

And then C.S.I.: NY begins. Oh wait -- House is just playing its theme song (better known as The Who's "Baba O'Riley," better known as "Teenage Wasteland") in his office. He plays along with the keyboard with one hand while pointing in a rocking-out fashion with the other. Then he sits and uses the other hand to play the piano part when it comes in. He looks a lot like me back in the days when I would listen to Tori Amos in my room and think about how much I hated high school and the world was so unfair, dammit! Feel free to make fun of me for this over email.

Vogler enters House's office, and House shouts above the music that he loves this part of the song, where the drums enter. He drums along with Keith Moon until Vogler stops the music and sits down. "You ruined it," House tells him. Vogler introduces himself as House's boss. House apologizes for not wearing his lab coat, claiming it was destroyed by the dry cleaners. And then his dog ate it. And then his alarm clock broke. Vogler takes out a bottle of ipecac and says that a "nurse" found it in Carly's purse. Chase, you weasel! "Oh my. If only I'd known," House says, not even trying to be convincing. He breaks it all down, saying that Vogler doesn't like House and he doesn't like Vogler, but that doesn't matter since one of them has money and the other has tenure, meaning they'll both be around for a while. So they might as well ignore each other. And then House turns his iPod back on, which starts playing "Hava Nagila." House scrambles to turn it off, saying it wasn't "nearly as dramatic as [he] was hoping." No, but it was damn funny and I hope it makes a reappearance in future episodes, like every time Cameron opens her mouth. Even Klezmer music is more pleasing to the ear. Also, the presence of Jewish folk music on House's iPod lends just a little more credence to the theory that he and Dr. Wilson are totally dating. I'm just saying.

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House

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