House
Control

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Sara M: C+ | Grade It Now!
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Women Have No Control

Somewhere in the concrete jungles of Manhattan, a high-powered woman wearing a high-powered business suit does some high-powered work. You know she's important because she asks for projections and a lot of phones ring around her. She takes a phone call about an upcoming meeting. The caller says she'd better have some stuff to tell the board about Asia. The woman, now given the name Carly, says that she totally made up the Asia thing, so she has nothing to say about it.

By the time the meeting starts, however, Carly has plenty to say, and tells the board that their makeup company is about to dominate the Asian market. I do wonder why their office appears to be located in an airplane hangar, though. Either an airplane hangar or part of the hospital set, with its identical use of windows and cherry-colored wood. The board is thrilled with the news about Asia, and wants to hear more. Carly's hands start shaking as she tells them that India, with its half-a-billion female population, has a lot of spending power. Not according to what I've seen of the country on The Amazing Race, although I'm sure that depiction is not entirely accurate. Carly grabs her right leg, and her CGI muscles swell and tighten and make the nastiest sounds. Carly calls an end to the meeting that just started as she text-messages an "I need help" to someone. Carly lies through her teeth that she has to go to another meeting with some Chinese state officials, and the board is very happy indeed. Wow, being a businessperson is easy -- all you have to do is make stuff up! Carly's assistant comes in and asks what's wrong. "I need a doctor," says Carly. "I can't move my leg!" I don't see why she couldn't have ended the meeting with that instead of the lie about China, but I guess it would have given her less CONTROL.

House brings Carly's case to the Cottages, who ask him how he got this case. House says that Carly is very high-powered, so her case had to be brought to "da man." And House apparently is "da man," which he always suspected. Cameron is the first to say that Carly's leg problem could be caused by the same thing that crippled House -- a blood clot. Chase doubts it. Foreman agrees that a herniated disc is much more likely. "I don't know, Eric," Cameron begins, drawing funny looks from all. Who does she think she is, Dr. Smiley? She gets Eric and Robert to agree that a blood clot, while unlikely, is also the most deadly of Carly's possible conditions, so they should focus on it first. "Stop talking," House tells her, because he says what most of this show's audience is thinking and that's why we love him. House infers that Cameron read one of those books for high-powered people on how to make friends and influence people and is attempting to use her newfound knowledge here. "Soft positional bargaining," House says, showing that he's read a couple of those books in his lifetime as well. "It's not gonna work." Nevertheless, House orders an angiogram to see if there's a clot, and tells Cameron to read less and watch more TV, where people use sex to get what they want, which works out better for everyone.

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