House
Deception

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Sara M: B+ | Grade It Now!
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House gets double-punished, as he now has to listen to Cameron whining that she didn't get to be the new boss. She wants to know if she's done something wrong to deserve this. House tells her to "shut up," and explains that Cuddy only picked Foreman because he's black. And that, people, is a racist thing to say. But it's not the only racist thing House will say in this episode, so I'll save the rant for later, especially because I can explain part of House's statement here by the fact that he would have said anything to shut Cameron up. It doesn't work, though, as Cameron asks him what he thinks of her leadership skills. House responds that they're "excellent" except for the fact that they're also "non-existent." "Kind of like Anica's tumor" is a great retort that Cameron does not offer. She whines that "there's more to being a leader than being a jerk!" First of all, Cams, you asked House for his opinion and he gave it to you. Sorry it wasn't what you wanted to hear, but you did ask. And second of all, House wasn't saying you had to be more of a jerk, he said you had no leadership skills. Hush, now.

Cameron and House part ways when she starts walking to her car and he heads for his motorcycle. "No way," Cameron states. House just tosses her his helmet. He says that there's construction on some road, so the motorcycle will be faster. Yeah, faster to DIE! He swings his leg over the motorcycle and revs it. Cameron and her non-existent leadership skills give up the fight and hop on the motorcycle behind him. She puts her hands at his side, and House grabs them and clasps them firmly around his torso. Jennifer Morrison does the perfect "I'm touching my crush!" smile here. And I have to say, that moment went a long way toward redeeming Cameron for me. I really wish they had kept her crush on House at this subtle and cute level instead of expanding it all out of control and weird and making her look like a creepy little girl with emotional problems. Too bad. As for House, it's hard to tell if he's smiling at having an attractive young woman's arms around him or grimacing at the thought of having to navigate snowy, construction-filled roads without a helmet, having given his only one to Cameron. I'm sure the motorcycle helmet safety committee is!

Anica's apartment sure looks lived-in for someone who just moved to town. Cameron finds two Post-It Notes on Anica's bathroom mirror reminding her of appointments with her ophthalmologist and gynecologist. Frequently seeing people whose job titles end in "ologist," Cameron explains, is a sign of Munchausen's. House points out that it could also mean that Anica has -- "and [he's] just thinking outside the box [heh heh -- "box"] here -- a VAGINA...and trouble reading." I think House is just upset because all this vagina talk gave him a flashback to his strawberry-flavored Clinic patient. For his part, he's found three different prescriptions of reading glasses, which indicates to him that Anica has a growing (yet still amazingly invisible) tumor pressing on her optic nerve. Plus, faking bad eyes is really scraping the bottom of the Munchausen's bucket, as far as I'm concerned. You don't get a whole lot of sympathy for nearsightedness. Cameron says that House is just seeing what he wants to see. He accuses her of doing the same thing. They're both right! "It's not your call," Cameron snots. Better call a taxi to bring you back to the hospital, Cameron! Minutes before you're putting your life in a crippled motorcyclist's hands is really not the right time to start showing off your leadership/jerk skills.

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