House

Episode Report Card
Sara M: B | 4 USERS: A
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How Wilson Lost A Girlfriend But Gained A Spine

Cuddy reports to House's front door. She says she knew something like this would happen, which is why she didn't want House to take the case in the first place. And she doesn't think House is being much of a friend by trying to guilt Wilson into staying at PPTH. House says it will get the results he wants. Cuddy says she won't let House walk out on a patient. He says she can fire him. You know what? She totally should. They've got Siegel, right? He would never walk out on one of his patients. Hell, I heard that he sings them to sleep every night. Cuddy can't believe House would rather lose his career than apologize. House claims that he tried to apologize, but Wilson didn't believe it, and neither did House for that matter. Cuddy breaks it down and says that House just doesn't want to admit how he actually feels about Wilson and what happened to Amber, because if he does that, he'll be vulnerable. And then if Wilson walks out on him anyway, it will suck all the more. Frustrated, she starts throwing around terms like "nerve deadening" and "emotionally obliterating," at which point House slams the door in her face. Undaunted, she yells at him through the door, accusing him of running away just like Wilson, and killing his patient in the process.

Meanwhile, Lou is conscious and wants to know where House is and if this new MS diagnosis was his idea. Hadley says House is sick and the diagnosis was a team effort. "But you're not really a team. You work for him," Lou says. Ha! You just know she's been waiting to make that remark since Hadley said her job was limited to starch knowledge. Lou agrees that she works for Marg just like Hadley works for House. Unlike Hadley, though, Lou holds no illusions as to how well Marg would handle herself without her. Marg would be just fine without Lou. Lou, on the other hand, would be nothing without Marg. Hadley is sure Lou could go from being an assistant to a leader, no problem. "Not everybody's created equal," Lou shrugs. She hasn't been at PPTH long, and conscious for even less of that time, but she's already figured out that House is the brains of this operation, so screw women's rights and giving female underlings the chance to get ahead with their crappy diagnoses. Hadley just lies and says that House thinks she has MS. With that, Lou gets really cold. But she's also running a fever. And that means it isn't MS.

House has to return to work because Cuddy had the cable in his apartment disconnected. Ha ha ha! She's still got a few tricks up her sleeve. Cuddy says she had help from a thirty-one-person maintenance crew that all hate House. House says if he won't return to work for a dying patient then he certainly won't because he can't watch TV. Cuddy points out that he's a few minutes away from missing his favorite soap. And she's made sure that the doctor's lounge remote is under her close supervision, so he can't watch it in there, either. And in comes Wilson, since Cuddy paged him under false pretenses to try to get both of them in the room together. Wilson turns to leave, but Cuddy threatens both him and House by withholding Wilson's salary history from every hospital in the tri-state area he applies to and setting all PPTH TVs to the Pottery Channel, which doesn't actually exist but totally should, if only for the pottery wheel bloopers show I just thought of, where we see people get hit with flying clay over and over again like what happened to me the one time I tried to use a wheel in art class.

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House

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