Fetal Position

Episode Report Card
Sara M: B+ | Grade It Now!
Fatal Disposition

Cameron and Chase prepare to fix Emma's mitral valve. Do you think they can do it without having sex with each other on top of their patient? I don't. Emma asks if she can skip the sedative, but Chase assures her that it's very mild and will not harm the baby. Cuddy wanders into the room, dons a protective blue vest, and tells Emma that they'll be monitoring her baby's heart separately to make sure it's fine. "You're both gonna be fine," says Cuddy, which tells us all that they're both gonna be close to death within the next ten minutes. Then she orders Cameron to knock Emma out, and for a "very mild" sedative, it sure does take her out with a quickness. Once she's gone, Cuddy orders them to start the procedure. They shoot each other "why is the boss watching us? How can we be expected to do well with the boss watching us?" looks, and start. The Magic Schoolbus Cam makes a brief, yet meaningless, appearance.

When the Cottages report back to House, he's on the phone with some airline trying to score nonstop tickets to Cambodia. When he gets put on hold, Cameron starts in with demands that House tell Cuddy to "stop interfering." House ignores this, and Chase says that while they fixed Emma's heart, that wasn't the problem after all, since her kidneys are still failing. I'm sure she and her insurance company appreciated the unnecessary procedure, though. Foreman's contribution is to ask House why he's vacationing in Cambodia: "Going to unwind in the killing fields?" Surprisingly, no one makes reference to adopting a random child, which Cambodia is better known for these days than that whole unfortunate Pol Pot genocide deal. House says he's hoping to catch a Mekong Giant Catfish, the biggest freshwater fish alive. Foreman's all pissed off about this, since the Mekong Giant Catfish is on the critically endangered species list he apparently keeps in his pocket at all times. House says that Chase and Cameron must have screwed up the procedure, to which Cameron immediately responds that House could have screwed up the diagnosis. Sure, Emma's mitral valve was a little wonky, but not enough to have caused all those problems. Foreman just says that they might want to consider putting Emma on dialysis before she, like, dies. They may also want to consider protecting the rainforest, which houses several endangered species and is disappearing at a rapid rate. And once it's gone, it's gone forever. They shoot around a bunch of possible diagnoses and go off to test for them. Then the travel agent comes back on the line, and House rushes to pick up the phone, only to hear a recording about the unexpectedly high call volume they're experiencing. Ha! That happens to me all the time, although it's usually accompanied by the most staticky, unpleasant Muzak ever.

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