Wilson asks whether anyone got a look at Elyce's breasts. "Men!" House scoffs. Ah, but there is a medical method to his ogling, as Wilson says Elyce could have paraneoplastic syndrome. House asks if there was any breast cancer in Elyce's family medical history. Cameron breathlessly says that Elyce's mother totally died of it. Awesome!
Cut to Ed, acting as our medical exposition elicitor. How can breast cancer cause brain problems? he wonders. Cameron tells him and us that in paraneoplastic syndrome, the body's antibodies go after brain cells instead of tumor cells, as the two have molecular similarities. It's a microscopic version of wanting a Coke, but only being able to find a Pepsi machine and settling for that. I guess. Honestly, it took me two days to figure out how to spell "paraneoplastic," let alone figure out what it actually is. Foreman says that the only treatment option is to go after Elyce's tumor -- providing that it's treatable. And that it actually exists. And I don't think I'm giving too much away by saying that it doesn't.
Cameron gives Elyce what I'm guessing is a mammogram. I've never had one, being way below the age that they start being a recommended thing to do and also having no family history of breast cancer to worry about. But most importantly, not having health insurance. Damn you Canadians and your universal health care, which despite having its own unique set of problems, is still preferable to not having coverage at all! ["Not to brag, but it is a pretty sweet deal." -- Wing Chun] Elyce doesn't particularly enjoy her mammogram, pronouncing it painful. Has she never had one before, despite being in her mid-thirties and having a mom who died of breast cancer? "I'm sorry!" Cameron responds, making a few of her best sympathy faces. Then she does whatever it is that you do to perform a mammogram, and I'm pretty sure people go to school for and train to be mammogram techs, but it appears that Cameron's going solo for this one. Once it's done, Elyce sighs that she wanted to have kids, but it looks like she won't be able to now. "A lot has changed since your mom died," says Cameron. Well, sure, but I'm guessing that you still can't have a baby if you're dead, which is probably Elyce's main concern right now, shut up Cameron.