House
Heavy

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Sara M: C- | Grade It Now!
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A Bevy Of Heavy

Jessica doesn't want to do the weigh-in for the test. Chase is not sympathetic, because he hates fat people. Foreman, on the other hand, tells Jessica that he used to be fat, too, and that all the kids made fun of him. Then he hit puberty and grew half a foot and wasn't fat anymore. Jessica gets all hopeful that this could happen to her, too, especially since her mother is tall and Jessica's short for her age. She steps up to the scale to get weighed.

Later, Chase snarls at Foreman for telling their patient that she can "grow out of" obesity, even though the girl does have the right-about-to-grow heaviness look to her. Chase prefers the tough-love approach to slimming down, which is to make fun of the fat person until she gets off the couch and stops eating crappy food. Cameron says she's sure Jessica gets enough of that attitude from everyone else, so she doesn't need it from some pretty-boy doctor, too. Cameron thinks people should be happy with however they look, as long as they're healthy. Chase points out that Cameron weighs all of ninety pounds, so that's easy for her to say. True.

Wilson and House shuffle through the cafeteria buffet line and talk about who's getting fired. House's new plan is to sexually harass Chase and Cameron and call Foreman a "spade" (which he says out loud right in front of another black hospital worker, because House has no concept of sensitivity. Fox, however, does, which is probably why House didn't go with the more realistic and inflammatory n-word) so that none of them can be fired without exposing the hospital to a pricey lawsuit. "You are uniquely talented in many areas," Wilson begins, and what areas he speaks of depends on whether or not you buy into the Wilson-House secret sex or not. He finishes by saying that House is not a good politician, and that it would be stupid for him to go up against Vogler. "Separate or together?" the cashier asks them. "Together," says House, and your interpretation of that line, again, depends on your interpretation of their relationship. House then walks out, leaving Wilson to pay for both of their lunches. Ha!

The Cottages perform the test on Jessica, who complains of being thirsty, which means a seizure or respiratory arrest is right around the corner. They're too busy making bets on which one of them is going to get fired to take much notice of Jessica until she starts telling everyone off and trying to remove all the medical tubing. As we go to commercial, Jessica's screaming obscenities, which is pretty cool.

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House

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