House
Honeymoon

Episode Report Card
Sara M: B+ | 1 USERS: B
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We'll Never Have Paris

Cameron does her best House impression as she directs the other Cottages in Mark's differential diagnosis. She asks Foreman if he's too tired from "stealing cars" to contribute to the discussion, and Foreman looks up from his bowl of cereal with murder in his eye. "I'm being House. It's-it's funny," Cameron says. Foreman seems to disagree. I like Cameron a lot more when she's being all goofy like this than when she's...well, at just about any other time she's onscreen. House enters the room, bids his staff a good morning, and asks for their differential diagnoses of their newest patient. Cameron says that there was nothing in the file to explain Mark's symptoms. Chase says that Mark had really high levels of chlorohydrate in his system when he was admitted, so maybe it's a drug thing. "Yeah, sorry. That was me," House says. You see, the patient didn't think he was sick, so they had to get him to the hospital using alternative methods. Cameron asks who did think the patient was sick, if the patient himself didn't, and House says it was the patient's wife. "The woman you used to live with?" Cameron says. "That's her Indian name," House says, asking what the point of this is. Cameron says the point is that they're taking a case because House believes the patient's wife over the patient himself: "What happened to 'everybody lies'?""I was lying," House says. He orders the Cottages to re-test Mark for everything his other doctors did, then ultrasound his abdomen, and then give it a CT scan. He asks if he missed anything. "Kitchen sink?" says Chase. "Well, we can certainly give that -- oh, you minx!" House says. I think Chase is more of a weasel than a minx, but to each his own (homoerotic comparison).

Wilson thinks House only took this chase to cure Mark, be a hero in Stacy's eyes, and win her back. House says he's pretty sure the fact that Stacy is married to someone else means that there will be no winning her back. Wilson recommends staying as far away from Stacy as he possibly can, and to treat this like a "regular case" and be his usual cold, distant self. Obviously, this will not happen.

Cameron tells Mark that all his tests were clear, so they still don't know what's causing his problems. Mark asks Stacy how many doctors have to tell him this before they can get back to their normal lives. "Just one," Stacy says. "House," Mark says. "It must be awkward being treated by the man who used to be involved with your wife," Cameron says. Well, I'm sure that little reminder doesn't make it any less so, Cammy. Stacy and Mark exchange "who is this person?" looks, and Mark says that there's nothing wrong with him.

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House

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