House

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Sara M: A+ | 4 USERS: A+
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Busted

And since he can't think about sex, Cuddy is apparently no longer necessary. She disappears as Driver appears. He suggests a bloody ear as a symptom, but House says he knows that Driver's ear never bled as there was no blood stain on his collar. House is the one with the bleeding ear. But Driver sticks to his bloody ear story, saying it could be a symptom of Huntington's. House says that doesn't jive with Driver's stomach problems and he's only thinking of it because he's thinking of Biana. Ew, why is he thinking of Biana? Stop thinking about Biana! Driver is a fountain of diagnoses, though, and suggests a shuffling gait that's a sign of early Parkinson's. And House's hallucinations have now officially come up with more diagnoses this season than Kumar. House doesn't see how he'd notice a shuffling gait on someone who was sitting down and driving, and that's when Driver disappears and that nicely-clothed woman appears behind House to tell him that the driver actually got up at one point to help an old woman onto the bus. By the way, "I'm the answer," she says. "Look." But House doesn't have time to do much of anything before he's thrown into an actual memory, and there's the driver shuffling along as he helps an old woman to her seat. Driver is, like, the nicest bus driver I've ever seen so now I hope he ends up being okay. With that, House smiles and turns back to the woman, only to see a bright light.

The light is coming from the ceiling, as someone blew House's cover and now we've got Cuddy, Foreman, Wilson, and Biana all standing over the open tank. Before they can help him up, he jumps up and proudly announces that he's figured out that Driver has Parkinson's and orders them to start him on some good old leva-dopa. They're more concerned with House's ear, as it's still bleeding. Biana points this out as if she's never seen it happen before. As for House, he barfs all over Cuddy and then collapses. I'd like to say I'm sympathetic, but it really is his own fault.

When House comes to, he's on his couch at home. That's what PPTH does to people with skull fractures and severe concussions? Sends them home? Honestly, Cuddy. I mean, there is a nurse there, but what can she do in a real emergency? Plus it's not even Evil Nurse Brenda. You guys, I've ... I've officially given up hope that we'll ever see her again. Because if we were going to see her, it'd be here. Sadness! Anyway, the Nurse Who Isn't Brenda says Cuddy ordered her to keep watch over House. Also on the list of Cuddy's orders: Tegulate House's Vicodin usage and post a PPTH security guard at House's door. Okay, I'm scoffing at this. We all know those security guards suck, as seen in the season finale two seasons ago when some guy shot House twice and then got away scot-free. He's STILL out there, by the way. House immediately figures out that Cuddy's going through all this trouble to make sure he can't go back to PPTH because his diagnosis must be wrong. The nurse just tells House to lie back because his injury is getting worse. Will no one put so much as a bandage on the poor guy's head?

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House

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