House
Human Error

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Sara M: C- | 1 USERS: A+
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Everybody Leaves

Esteban is sitting around wishing he was Milo Ventimiglia when his wife comes rushing out on a stretcher with a team of people doing CPR on her. Nobody will tell him anything more than that her heart stopped.

So Esteban shows up at House's office (no doubt having gotten directions from Foreman), and House mistakes him for a janitor and says he can vacuum the floor later. And this is how House gets Sirhaned by yet another angry husband in yet another season finale. Not really. Esteban just asks what happened to his wife. House doesn't know and doesn't want to talk to people who don't speak perfect English, because he's an asshole. I hope next time his leg has a blood clot in it, he's stuck in a non-English speaking country where the doctors laugh at him for not knowing their language instead of treating him. Esteban desperately says that he risked his life to see House after looking him up and seeing that after every other doctor gave up, House fixed people. He's the only person who can save Marina, but he's just ignoring her and making fun of Esteban. "How do you fix something if you don't look at it?" Esteban asks. This gives House an idea. He leaves Esteban standing in his office. Maybe Esteban will do some vacuuming while he's there.

House walks into the OR while they've got Marina's chest open to hook her up to the bypass machine. House asks to see her heart, being uncharacteristically careful to observe sterile procedures while doing so. But, like the surgeon, he can't see anything physically wrong with it. He tells the surgeon to "give her a jump start" and someone hands the guy some electric salad tongs. He zaps the heart a bunch of times, but nothing happens. The surgeon pronounces the heart unstartable, saying it doesn't matter why it can't start. It does to House. The surgeon says they'll keep Marina on bypass so her husband can say goodbye. They won't, apparently, bother to close her up, as everyone just walks away from the table while Marina's chest is still open.

Unlike Chase, who packed up his stuff in like three seconds, Foreman's still packing his stuff up in the most conspicuous of locations when Cameron walks in with a goodbye present for him. I hope it's a needle infected with an unknown deadly disease, like the last present Foreman gave her, but it's actually a framed table of contents of the Midwest Journal Of Experimental Medicine with Foreman's article highlighted. In yellow, not pink. And there are no flowers or hearts drawn around it, nor is there anything about plagiarism. I would have at least included a page from the dictionary with plagiarism highlighted in a matching frame, but Cameron's more decent than I am. "I'll miss you," she says. Even though she knows he won't miss her. Man, she is just too nice. Foreman says he will miss her, and they hug. Aw, but it doesn't matter since there's no way Foreman's actually leaving. House walks in and does not remark that Cameron is moving onto her next conquest. Instead, he says that the surgeon found nothing wrong with Marina's heart.

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