House heads into work the next day, where the Cottages inform him that they found no lead in Sir William's biopsy and his heart is getting worse. "There's only one thing left to do!" House says. What could that be? Well, the strums of a lute tell us that YES! House is going to the Ren Faire. And in costume, because why not? I'm sure detailed medieval clothing like that is easy to find. Oh, but he made Hadley come with him, and she is also in medieval dress. She says this is a waste of time, but House begs to differ. "Just because Wilson's acting stupid doesn't mean we are," Hadley says. Huh? Mind your own business, wench! House asks if she thinks Wilson is making a mistake, like when did he care about Hadley's opinion on anything? "Of course," she says. Um, then WHY DID YOU ENCOURAGE HIM TO DATE SAM LAST WEEK?!?! Does Hadley secretly hate Wilson? House ties this all in to the patient of the week, saying that Wilson naturally lives by his own code of "honor and chivalry." Yeah, like the one where he cheated on like all of his wives? Please. Hadley thinks that makes Wilson a "great guy." House thinks it makes him a "sucker and a target." Yeah, like for his "best friend" who makes him buy him an apartment that will screw up his friendship with his boss and then makes him fill it with furniture. With that, House wanders off towards the apothecary shop.
Hadley protests that she and Foreman already checked the place out, but House insists on taking a look. Oh, no. The apothecary is there, and he won't break character. "I cry your pardon, sir," he says. House holds up a jar and asks what's inside it. "Why, that's lavender!" Apothecary says with his silly fake English accent. "Try rose hips," House says. Oh, snap! You just got out-apothecary'd! "Who cares?" Hadley asks. House does, because if the apothecary can't tell his lavender from his rose hips, then who knows what else he's labeled falsely in there. He holds up another jar. "Be nothing but St. John's Wort," Apothecary says. WRONG! It's black cohosh. At this, the Apothecary drops the act and the accent and says this is his uncle's shop and he's just an apprentice, so wouldst thou please stop busting his balls? House ignores him for a bunch of hanging plants, which he rummages through until he comes up with a few root vegetables. He asks the apprentice to identify them. "A wild carrot," he says. WRONG FOR A THIRD TIME! "It's hemlock, you embossed carbuncle," House says. Hadley and Apprentice both look horrified, because hemlock is kind of poisonous. Especially if you eat big chunks of the root because you think it's a carrot. In fact, water hemlock like what we see in the apothecary shop is the most poisonous plant in this continent. Which is why House probably shouldn't be touching it with his bare hands, but whatever. Also, WHY ON EARTH WOULD A REN FAIRE APOTHECARY SHOP STOCK THE MOST POISONOUS PLANT IN ALL OF NORTH AMERICA?!?!?!?!?! House's next question is has anyone purchased any of his wild carrots. Apprentice says he sold but one branch, and that was to King Miles. "The only part of the environment you didn't check -- the people living in it," House says to Hadley. Yes, that and THE INCREDIBLY TOXIC PLANTS DANGLING IN PLAIN SIGHT PRETENDING TO BE CARROTS.