House

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Knight Fail

Sir William's campsite is a giant tent full of fake knight equipment. Foreman finds some barf on the floor and decides to look through it. He plucks an intact cow's eyeball from the mess, and queen-to-be Shannon explains that King Miles likes to make his knights eat nasty food the night before a tournament to prove their bravery. "He got the idea from Fear Factor," she says. Joe Rogan strikes again! He is the root of all evil. Foreman wonders why Sir William didn't mention eating this stuff when he went to the hospital. Well, it looks like he barfed it all up, so he didn't really eat it, did he? Also, King Miles says, his knights are sworn to secrecy about their stupid rituals and "William tends to take his role as a knight very seriously." And if King Miles is saying you take your Ren Faire role seriously, you might want to get some help.

House doesn't seem to think the eyeball is any danger, as we next see him bouncing it on the meeting room table like a superball. We're not supposed to think that's a real eyeball, right? Because those don't bounce like that. They don't really bounce at all. Just splat. Don't ask me how I know this. Hadley lists the rest of the things King Miles made his knights eat: testicle, cow brain, and "pig rectum with a side order of sphincter." Chase continues to chew his lunch, unbothered. "I think they call that breakfast in Australia," Taub says. Oh, come now, Taub. Vegemite isn't that bad. Chase just grins with a long string of something hanging down from his mouth. Can't imagine why Cameron divorced that! House thinks that Sir William was allergic to something in the food, which is why he got sick and no one else did. He tells them to test Sir William for allergies to everything they have samples of while also treating him for the allergy they don't know that he has.

With Shannon at his beside (in normal clothes, which she apparently does possess), Foreman and Hadley get ready to test Sir William while he insists that Shannon go home to work on her upcoming wedding to King Miles. Oh, I bet they're having it at the Ren Faire, and when family members received invitations in the mail, they all sighed like you do when you're slightly ashamed about who you're related to. I did that earlier this week when I was facebooking distant relatives and saw one is married to a guy with a mullet. He isn't a blood relative, but still. Shannon says they were going to postpone the wedding until Sir William was feeling better, but he assures her that he'll be fine and even makes a joke about the photographer needing a good red-eye filter for his bright red eyeballs. Yeah, like they're going to have a photographer at the wedding. Try some guy who can paint really fast. Hadley starts to do the scratch allergy test on Sir William's arm and the trouble starts. "That feels really strange," he says as his monitors beep warningly. Yes, his heartbeat has become irregular and must be shocked back into a normal rhythm. While Hadley warms up the paddles, Foreman opens Sir William's gown to reveal a rash on his chest.

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House

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