House
House

Episode Report Card
Sara M: B | 1206 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
You Are What You Eat

House heads for Adam's room to try to use his Autistic Whisperer skills again. He holds up a board with pictures of Adam's backyard on it and affixes a Polaroid of jimson weed to it. He asks Adam if he's ever eaten it. The parents don't think that House will be able to get through to Adam, but House holds up Adam's PSP and says that if he doesn't tell House what he needs to know, it'll be "game over." "Show me what you ate!" House orders. Adam squirms and moans, but lifts his arm and grabs the picture of...the sandbox. Damn. And then one of Adam's eyeballs starts moving around of its own accord and we have another symptom.

The next meeting place will be the chapel, which already has a few grief-stricken, higher-power seeking visitors who are none-too-pleased to have their quiet moment of reflection and prayer destroyed by some doctor and his temper tantrum. House puts on a Southern-evangelist preacher accent and asks the group what Adam's new wonky eye could mean. In between apologizing to the exiting parishioners, Chase says that ocular paralysis is consistent with jimson weed. But House says the eye wasn't paralyzed; it was pirouetting. "MS," Cameron guesses, actually talking about the case for the first time this episode. House rejects this with some long-winded Southern preacher impression that Cameron does not enjoy. Foreman guesses they're looking at one of those invisible micro-tumors they're always incorrectly diagnosing patients with. The tumor started in Adam's lungs, then metastasized into his liver and then his brain. House doubts they could have missed three tumors, but Foreman is sure he'll be able to find it now that he knows where to look. That could mean removing Adam's eye, which will make Adam "only half as good at not making eye contact," House says. That shouldn't be funny, but it is.

House munches on some crackers and stares off into space for a while. Cuddy walks up and greets him several times before House acknowledges her presence, apparently trying to act autistic himself just to see what it's like. Cuddy tells him that Ali doesn't love him: she showed up on Cuddy's doorstep last night and came onto her. "She's even more perfect than I thought!" House says. Cuddy really doesn't understand the male mind very well, does she? She says that Ali has a real problem and should be treated instead of indulged. House doesn't believe Cuddy's story, which is good because it was a lie; House discovers this when Cuddy says Ali has a mole on her boob and House says he knows for a fact that she doesn't. Now Cuddy is appalled that House has seen Ali's breasts, but seeing as how the entire Clinic saw them when Foreman walked in the room and exposed them to everyone, I don't see how that makes House so special. Cuddy says that Ali actually came back to PPTH and Cuddy locked her in her office until House could go talk to her and "put an end to this." Or you could just call the police like you said you would, Cuddy. You're the head of the entire hospital; act like it.

House

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