House comes back to PPTH with a brown recluse spider he caught in Hadley's apartment. She wants to know where he found it, showing remarkable calm for someone who's just been told there's a horrible poisonous spider in her house. I would have screamed and jumped up on the table and called seven exterminators by now, but that Hadley is one cool cucumber. Obviously she's never been bitten by a spider or she'd know better. I hate spiders! Shut up about how they're so good for the earth because they eat bugs. I don't care! Bugs > spiders. House says he found another interesting item and slowly reaches into his pocket to take it out as Hadley is supposed to look nervous. When he produces an inhaler, she's relieved. "Yeah. My inhaler is fascinating. It's got its own extensive online following," she says. It probably does now. At the very least, it has its own livejournal community. Hadley's sarcasm falls on deaf ears once again, as no one in the room appreciates her special brand of wit. Instead, Taub asks if she has asthma. Duh, Taub. Shut up. Hadley says she had asthma as a kid, and it started acting up again when she moved into her new place. That ... doesn't strike her as suspicious? I had asthma as a kid too, and I'd be very concerned if it suddenly came back. Maybe it's a symptom of Huntington's. Kumar's just surprised that Hadley moved and no one told him. He should be happy that he wasn't asked to help her carry boxes, or that heavy-looking metal bed frame. House thinks he should go back to Hadley's apartment to look around for whatever it was that he noticed she was worried he had in his pocket. Kumar is focused on the spider bite theory, and volunteers to check Spencer for bite marks. House immediately tells him to sit down and let a woman perform the search. He didn't seem all that concerned about the appearance of impropriety when he was looking in an underage girl's vagina for a tick a few years ago. I wonder why?
And so, we've got Hadley doing the exam of the woman she slept with last night, which is ridiculously unethical not to mention probably not the best choice for Spencer's health, either. Do you really think Hadley will be as conscientious and thorough as someone who didn't want this to be over as soon as possible and hated the patient for using her? Spencer doesn't seem to mind, although she does take issue with Hadley's insistence on wearing safety gloves, saying she didn't need them last night, so why now? "The other night I wasn't your doctor," Hadley says. She's still not Spencer's doctor as far as I'm concerned. Hell, she isn't a doctor at all. I do like how Hadley closed the blinds to give Spencer privacy but didn't even close them all the way, so now not only can anyone look in and see what's going on, but also the room is dim, making it harder to find spider bites. As Hadley feels Spencer up, she says she really didn't want to ever see her again after their fling. She never wants to see any of her one night stands again. Spencer says she figured Hadley had done the cruising thing before, since she was "awfully good at it." That's good, since she sucks at being a doctor. Hadley just says she would have thought "awfully good" would qualify for a better score than seven, then. Spencer seems to think that truly great sex comes when you know the person you're with and not when it's a random one night stand. And also when you're not both drunk and on Ecstasy. Spencer thinks that with more practice, Hadley could be a nine. She turns to face Hadley and moves in for a kiss. But then her hip goes numb so it doesn't happen. Hadley says that rules out the spider bite theory.